Page 1769 - What Could Have Brawled

15th Nov 2022, 6:00 AM in What About Discord?
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What Could Have Brawled
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Author Notes:

Newbiespud 15th Nov 2022, 6:00 AM edit delete
Funny story: I had a bit of writer's block figuring out how to get the interpretation of this crazy battle started. Then I realized, "Oh, this has Rainbow Dash written all over it." Thank you, Rainbow Dash, for getting me through yet another one.

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Achtungnight 15th Nov 2022, 6:02 AM edit delete reply
Diplomacy has failed!

I honestly can’t ever remember an occasion where it succeeded.
sun tzu 15th Nov 2022, 6:16 AM edit delete reply
Well, there was the time my human paladin managed to negotiate with the local kobold clan, and hire them as mercenaries for a joint assault on the evil cult that had started a localized zombie apocalypse. ...I spent a lot of effort in the ensuing battle trying to minimize kobold losses. XD
ChaoticBrain 15th Nov 2022, 8:09 AM edit delete reply
One time, we played a setting where monster humanoids were attempting to leave their old Evil-aligned deities behind and become accepted by the above-ground civilizations. Our party consisted of mostly monster humanoids, including my Half-Drow Beguiler, Meryl. The primary antagonistic force was the MacGregor Society, a proud guild of monster slayers (read: above-grounder supremacists) who didn't much care to allow this integration to happen. Meryl's backstory involved being born to a human father who later sold her and her mother out to the MacGregor Society to get in their good graces.
As it happened, we were eventually able to arrange a meeting with Ernie Bridgestone, the dwarven leader of one of the more tolerant MacGregor branches. Meryl acted as the advocate, using Disguise Self to pass as a human. Meryl gave a rather compelling speech (which involved no small amount of me preparing talking points ahead of time) advocating for the rights of monster races, and using parts of her own backstory as evidence that the MacGregor society as a whole was becoming more monstrous than the supposed "monsters" they were fighting.
Not only did I succeed at preventing combat against Bridgestone, but he was convinced to splinter his branch off from the MacGregor Society and aid us in our mission to take it down. The other players at the table were also rather impressed, and somewhat moved by Meryl's story.
Classic Steve 15th Nov 2022, 10:52 AM edit delete reply
Once an NPC who had been part of a contrary cult found herself abandoned by her object of worship. As a druid, I assured her that Mother Nature never forgets her own. I must have said it very well, because the GM gave it to me without a roll.
evileeyore 15th Nov 2022, 11:22 AM edit delete reply
You've either never played a Diplomancer ('cuase you'd remember your victories) or your Party never allows Diplomancy to actually succeed.

I have a strong tendency to play "skills" characters, so I end up playing a good share of Diplomancers, and trust me, with a semi-smart Diplomancer, diplomacy always works.
Malroth 16th Nov 2022, 12:25 AM edit delete reply
The Diplomancer and the Thrallherd should be easier to tell apart.
evileeyore 24th Nov 2022, 3:21 PM edit delete reply
They are... your enemies can always say "No" to the Diplomancer. They just might live to see the error their ways once the Diplobrat lets the Barbarian off the chain.
terrycloth 17th Nov 2022, 5:42 AM edit delete reply
The last party I was in I had like +50 diplomacy but the GM never let it succeed, and then the party would yell at me for breaking stealth. There were like two stealthy characters in a party of nine (including cohorts and companions) so 'stealth' wasn't even a thing.

"Why did you even think that would work?"
"The GM spent five minutes describing the enemies' social dynamics and relationships. How else was I supposed to interpret that?"
Hariman 15th Nov 2022, 1:06 PM edit delete reply
There was a Shadowrun module I played a while back where the final fight opened with both sides taking ineffective shots at each other, and then one of the party members decided to try talking.

He rolled well enough that we DID talk it out, and found out that the kidnapping was actually an inside job to test the loyalty of a middle manager that was up for promotion.
Winged Cat 15th Nov 2022, 4:19 PM edit delete reply
Winged Cat
Where diplomacy fails, try Dashplomacy?
Warlock 15th Nov 2022, 4:57 PM edit delete reply
I've had a few games where my Noble status has effectively taken bandit camps and hired them as town guards by literally writing a conditional pardon - basically the best way to catch thieves is to hire them. Most found the pay and secure line of work so decent that few returned to brigand status. Ironically, the first group wound up becoming the local tax collectors, which was an ironic twist of fate they ultimately became legalized bandits to some...
Jennifer 15th Nov 2022, 9:54 PM edit delete reply
I had a lone player (a barbarian at that) take a few NPC guards to the tavern to help deal with a mercenary company of orcs that were trashing the place. I'd broken out an old "ork bar brawl" game from White Dwarf to assist with what I expected to be a classic encounter for this newbie player. He was informed that his party were part of the city guard, and they were not to kill any of the orcs, as they were allied to the city which happened to be at war.

He talked the orcs down.

He had help from the dice, of course, but darned if his first choice wasn't to find a peaceful solution.
Prairie Son 16th Nov 2022, 8:18 AM edit delete reply
With or without the bard using Seduce Everything? Because I'm pretty sure those *stories* could go on for the rest of the year.
Chakat Firepaw 16th Nov 2022, 11:28 AM edit delete reply
Apparently in the Kingmaker AP, dealing with a particular tribe of kobolds though diplomacy almost the norm. To the point that it wasn't strange for that bit to be covered with little more than describing what position Chief Sootscale was given in the new government.
Lady Sandry 17th Nov 2022, 3:58 AM edit delete reply
Our group regularly has diplomacy work when it shouldn't, and NOT when it should. We have zero druids in our group, but two people whose race gives innate Wild Empathy, and one of whom is a bard. Everyone in the party now has pets who once attacked us, three of which have been Awakened to become cohorts--A Giant Winter Weasel, a Moose, and a Wolf.

The same bard also failed a bluff check six turns in a row against an enemy whose Sense Motive was lower than her Bluff, when the entire point of the combat was that we had to succeed on the Bluff check TWICE before we killed her.
The checks ended up being passed by the artificer and the sorcerer instead, both of whom have MUCH lower bluff scores, though at least the sorcerer has a good charisma.
CyanWhisp 15th Nov 2022, 7:14 AM edit delete reply
Oh, just you wait, Twi. It WILL be your style. FOR THE RG!!!
Bed Head 15th Nov 2022, 2:40 PM edit delete reply
Rainbow Dash woke up and chose violence.

Excuse me, I meant *was born* and chose violence.
Colin 16th Nov 2022, 6:21 PM edit delete reply
Heh. Have to remember that one.
Roguim 15th Nov 2022, 3:15 PM edit delete reply
Dash knows that violence is never the answer, it's the question and the answer is: Yes
Digo 16th Nov 2022, 3:57 PM edit delete reply
I had several encounters end poorly because the party was filled with a bunch of diplohobos.
Newbiespud 16th Nov 2022, 7:19 PM edit delete reply
Finally, a named archetype that describes my playstyle!