Page 516 - One Forward, Two Back

13th Nov 2014, 6:00 AM
One Forward, Two Back
Average Rating: 5 (3 votes)
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Author Notes:

Newbiespud 13th Nov 2014, 6:00 AM edit delete
Newbiespud
Scrapped line:
DM: Maybe next time, leave my dining room table out of this.

58 Comments:

BadHorse 13th Nov 2014, 6:14 AM edit delete reply
This time, tell a story about how you accidentally did something in character, or something out of character that your DM made in character. Bad results are good, but good results are good too!
BadHorse 13th Nov 2014, 6:22 AM edit delete reply
My favorite instance is when I was playing a hero game and the party telepath was forcing me to go along against my will. We were meeting the press, and as they asked questions, I would give an answer, and she would either let it through or nix it as necessary. I began with screaming "I'm being oppressed!" and "Help! A telepath is manipulating my every action!" which became "I'm so happy to be here," and "we're all such close friends," then I tried to get sneaky, slip some coded messages through, oblique references, that sort of thing. No joy, she was too sharp. Finally, they asked if I was dating someone, and I looked over at her, smiled, and said, "What? No, WE'RE MARRIED!" The player was so taken by surprise that she couldn't manage anything more than a mumbly "W-W-WHAT???" and so the line went through. Didn't help me escape, but it was pretty sweet.
BadHorse 13th Nov 2014, 6:27 AM edit delete reply
Then there was the time I punched a villain we were taking captive, but forgot I was wearing punching daggers at the time...
Digo 13th Nov 2014, 6:47 AM edit delete reply
In an X-Files game, three of us (two FBI agents and an age sixteen consultant) were joking around about doing a fake sting operation at a convenience store. The idea was to have my character buy booze and cigarettes with a false ID then the two agents come in and "arrest" me, confiscating the booze and cigs as evidence. They'd let the cashier get off on a stern warning, because the whole point was to get free booze and cigs.

The GM didn't know we were just joking around so he actually made it happen. We're sooo glad the Agency didn't find out about our dumb stunt. XD

Or the fact I was drinking some of the beer we took. So yeah, America's tax dollars at work was an in-joke there.
Specter 13th Nov 2014, 9:57 AM edit delete reply
Specter
In a pony campaign I played a while ago, I had a GM who took everything we said we did, and said we did that (I don't blame him, I did the same thing until I adopted the "Are you sure you want to do that?" rule). I had no qualms with that play style, it kept most of us from "doing" really dumb stuff... most of us.

Two foals of the groups (4 out of 9 of us did play kids) decided it would be a good idea to pull a prank not only on a member of the group, but on the local police as well (or they thought of it and wanted to put it to action, but not really). During our temporary stay in Hoofington, the two kids, Winter Wind and Fire Cracker, asked Lucky Stone to go to the store and buy some food for them (in context, they and two others were there on a stake-out to see if our mark would exit a building they were watching from an alternative location).

He agreed to do so, but that was because he was trying to find a reason to go get some munchies after getting a "little" high... Couldn't really call him Stoned, it would sound weird. The kids knew ahead of time he was high, and he always carries a load of the stuff on operations such as this to pass the time, and they, IRL, joked, "We should go and see if we can go and get some police to crack down on him for the illegal distribution and possession of drugs."... the GM said "Ok, go and do it". The look on all of our faces were priceless, as said by the GM, after the incident. So they went way ahead of him to find some patrolling officers and said that there was a earth pony in a trench coat selling drugs to minors.

Lucky was found and arrested very shortly after that. We didn't know where he had gone till until after a semi-successful operation, where we had to blow out one of our mark's legs with a sniper, to get them, due to the disappearance of three of our members. Winter and Fire told us that he was intercepted en-route to the store for some supplies by the police. I, being the only one who wasted next to nothing on money, had to pay 5,000 bits for his release. Unfortunately for the kids, they went along with me to say things like "what happened?" and that nonsense, and before we got him, one of the officers they saw recognized them and wanted to congratulate them on finding a seller.

I didn't tell Lucky, or the rest of the team about their stunt, but I did discipline them as my backstory said would be appropriate, I forced them up into a large construction building, binded Winter Wind's wings to her with some duct-tape, tied them together, tied their hind legs to the building, and bungeed them off (I did a number of things like this to them, and it was in the middle of the night thankfully). I was not the good guy of the team, in fact I was released on parole to the team after being arrested for going too far with interrogations while in the military. Despite my level headedness and how calmly I do this, only the two kids and our team leader knows now.
Mykin 13th Nov 2014, 11:02 AM edit delete reply
Mykin
During one of three trips to the dragon cultist's camp (I will eventually tell this story in full one day), we decided that I would pretend to be a prisoner to get info on the cult and during our escape attempt (which was not subtle at all since stealth is an alien word to us) I decided to light a tent on fire to distract most of the camp and give us a better chance of getting away. Considering how much bad luck my character has had for the entire campaign up to this point, I sarcastically said "Knowing my luck, my gear was in that tent I just set on fire." we laughed, made some other witty comments, and went back to the escape attempt.

Next session, we returned to find most of the camp had uprooted and left, with only a few new guards that wouldn't have recognized us keeping watch of the cave we were going to investigate. During our idle chatter, our sorcerer decided to ask asked about the escape attempt (since they mentioned that the boss was ticked about the slaves escaping and he had just joined us after our flamboyant escape.) The guard basically said this: "Yea, some psycho pansy elf went berserk and burnt down the tent that had his equipment in it while he was running away. I mean, who destroys their own stuff anyway??" My half-elf looked at him with the kind of shock and horror one would associate with watching your own house burn down with your stuff still inside while I, in real life, kept banging on the table and repeated "I knew it!" about a few dozen times. I probably would of strangled the DM as well if he hadn't replaced all my stuff at the end of the last session to make up for how impossible it would of been for me to have gotten my stuff back at the time. Either way, we all had a good laugh.
Raxon 13th Nov 2014, 12:04 PM edit delete reply
Raxon
Does accidentally setting my face on fire count? It got ruled that since I was role-playing with the pipe, and I had the match in my other hand, gesturing while I spoke, it was in character. Thus, my dude set his own face on fire while negotiating safe passage through orc territories. The orcs decided we could go, but they sent ten warriors with us as an honor guard.

They were armed with buckets of water.
Blueblade 14th Nov 2014, 7:52 PM edit delete reply
Clearly they were expecting wicked witches of the west but no need to worry about wicked witches from the east otherwise they would've brought a house!
( or was it the other way around...)
Ironhart 13th Nov 2014, 12:46 PM edit delete reply
Nothing particularly damning springs to mind, but there was an occasion during a session where one of my co-players hugged me completely impromptu. Our GM immediately created a new rule whereby physical interaction out of character was translated into character. We still haven't come up with an explanation as to why my cloistered Dwarf cleric was suddenly manhandled by the party's half-elf sorceror.
Spike of the Bastion 13th Nov 2014, 2:31 PM edit delete reply
Our DM is a really awesome guy, he's that rare kind of DM that doesn't actively try to kill the players. However, his signature die "Soulstealer" on the otherhand does.
Anyway, our Dragonborn Berserker lost his axe after having the brilliant idea of throwing it to kill a cowardly kobold. When he went to retrieve it was gone so we had to chase them down.
So we find their camp and the plan was to have our doppelganger go in and swipe it back. Then this happened

Berserker - "I wonder if I can slingshot myself into the camp with a tree."
*Soulstealer rolls*
DM - "THAT IS A BRILLIANT IDEA!" (Nat 1)
Me - "Um... can I tell if that's a bad idea."
*Soulstealer rolls again* (Nat 1)
DM - "You think the plan is flawless and encourage him to go with it."
ME - "Oh joy"
Warlord - "What about me?"
*Rolls* (Nat 1)
DM - "You decide to help him with is plan"

Needless to that plan didn't work as planned, but it was amusing and thankful no one was killed because they failed Intelligence rolls.

Sidenote: Later in the game our Warlord desiced he wanted to stack plates on a meditating mage, thankful we managed to stop him this time.
Narcolepto 13th Nov 2014, 9:57 PM edit delete reply
Well, actually...

Just tonight some cultists were stealing a crate of masks from us that we stole from a demon that was planning on giving them to The Medusa. My character had become attached to a certain mask and after we recovered the crate, I feverishly asked, "And my mask?! Is it there? I rush into the crate to search for it and put it on if I find it!"

Thus... http://imgur.com/EGJuS6W
DeS_Tructive 14th Nov 2014, 2:49 AM edit delete reply
DeS_Tructive
We have the house rule that when a player talks abou his character's thought processes or emotions, others can pick it up with a successful empathy check. We decided on this ages ago to speed up play and encourage acting.
New players always take a while to get used to it, and the fun that is had when characters are trying to be sneakier than their players can be is awesome.
Needless, it also counts for facial expressions and laughter. So if one of our players is a snarker, his character will be too.
Paradoxical 14th Nov 2014, 6:55 AM edit delete reply
I was playing a high chr. trader/merc who was talking to a client who was messed over and in my tact I essentially said, "oh well I guess if we don't succeed in this nearly impossible task you're going to be found out and at best killed!"
I was slightly more subtle than that, but. . . yeah.
After having said that I realized that my character might have actually said it AND NOT CARED. Yup, he's my client. Doesn't mean I care if he lives or dies, just as long as I get paid. And WAITAMINUITE I could get paid like 5x's this amount for passenger shipping!
celestdaer 14th Nov 2014, 9:36 AM edit delete reply
In a campaign someone wrote up based on the merging of Mass Effect, Halo, and Transformers, if I remember correctly, I played an Asari ex Spectre (publicly 'Ex' Spectre because I was vocal about curing the Genophage before the events of Mass Effect 3) I forget exactly what happened, but at the end of the first chapter of the campaign, we had to leave our Quarian (who had just had his arm cut off) behind a blast door, and the rest of the group (including myself and... three human Halo characters) had to get the hell out of there. The GM looked at us after the session, and said, "Well, down one member, but you saved the universe, you think."
And my immediate response was, "Those are acceptable losses."
The GM looks across the table at me, then over to the Quarian's player, and says, "Did you hear that? You're 'acceptable losses'."
"One person versus the universe? That's better than most Spectre can expect." Note that I was saying this having NEVER played Mass Effect... I was running on what I'd read on the wiki...
MumaKirby 14th Nov 2014, 1:01 PM edit delete reply
MumaKirby
"If Gina's giving my character a look half as scary as the one you're giving me right now, he wets his pants and stops."
you know that guy 13th Nov 2014, 6:21 AM edit delete reply
Spike is a baby dragon. He's about the equivalent of, what, an eight-year-old? I have to wonder if he has goals, and what they are, because the show doesn't do a good job of telling us.
Digo 13th Nov 2014, 6:41 AM edit delete reply
If he's anything like real 8-year old kids, then yeah he has goals. :)
Draxynnic 13th Nov 2014, 6:54 AM edit delete reply
A lot of which seem to revolve around tasty, tasty gems that, given the opportunity, he munches on like candy...

...so yeah, quite a bit like real 8-year-old kids. :P
CharginChuck 13th Nov 2014, 12:51 PM edit delete reply
CharginChuck
Well, his goals WERE to touch his nose with his tongue, play his belly like a bongo and smell his feet. But now that he's accomplished those, who knows?
Steeeve 13th Nov 2014, 6:47 AM edit delete reply
reminds me of Weregeek where Mark uses his new solid steel dice, rolls a nat 20... and breaks the table.
bboy12 13th Nov 2014, 1:27 PM edit delete reply
Give me a link to that please!
Specter 13th Nov 2014, 9:15 AM edit delete reply
Specter
Why would you leave your dining room table out of it? Cause I'll tell you the truth, if it has something to do with a dining table being destroyed, I've cracked two of our's in half by picking them up (from the two furthest ends), and smashing it down hard because I was trying to get my older (and one younger) siblings from arguing and giving me a headache (I am surprised how science dictated how it would rack in half too, the tables in question where still JUST usable for eating).
Dusk Raven 13th Nov 2014, 9:33 AM edit delete reply
A long time ago, one of my D&D groups had a table which was provided by one of the players. In return, the DM let him re-roll one die roll per day by banging on the table.

It was surprisingly effective.
Digo 13th Nov 2014, 11:14 AM edit delete reply
Never broke a table, but witnessed one player break a futon my dropping his bag of gaming books on it.
Disloyal Subject 13th Nov 2014, 5:00 PM edit delete reply
Disloyal Subject
Break a futon? HOW?
Shiwanabe 13th Nov 2014, 10:35 PM edit delete reply
Probably one of the ones with wooden slats underneath for all us 'wimpy white guys'.
Super Kami Guru 14th Nov 2014, 12:23 AM edit delete reply
No joke, futons are about the most uncomfortable things to sleep on. I honestly sleep better on the ground in some cases.
Disloyal Subject 14th Nov 2014, 3:17 PM edit delete reply
Disloyal Subject
I've had good results from them; beds are usually too squooshy for me and cots too creaky/firm.
Then again, I've slept comfortably on a boulder halfway up a mountain, so it's entirely possible I just have strange taste.
Breaking the frame, though, makes sense. I'd forgotten most people use a frame, and was trying to picture the cloth rupturing from the sheer force of a bag-o'-books, considering the abuse mine have put up with - much of which was also from gamebooks!
Digo 14th Nov 2014, 6:24 AM edit delete reply
This futon lost it's slats long ago, so my friend (who owned the futon) used a thin wooden door as a slat. The bag had... well a LOT of books. The force of dropping it cracked the door and snapped one end of the metal frame that held the door up.

I imagine maybe the frame was already weak for the bag to do that, but it's no less frightening to think how heavy that bag was.
Specter 14th Nov 2014, 9:06 AM edit delete reply
Specter
... I've been sleeping on a futon for almost a year now, and it's really not that bad. Oh sure, I've made an indent where I've been sitting the entire time, and my brother broke a leg from sitting too hard, and it's covered in dust from not being cleaned, but it's still good.
Toric 13th Nov 2014, 1:02 PM edit delete reply
It surprises me that Rarity's player would get so out of sorts so quickly as to bang on the table. I'm sure she had at least some idea what she was getting herself in for, so the gesture typically associated with frustration seems just a little premature in this case.
Specter 13th Nov 2014, 1:11 PM edit delete reply
Specter
You would be surprised by how out of character and upset people could get over nothing. This player IS, however, an exception.
Mykin 13th Nov 2014, 1:59 PM edit delete reply
Mykin
@Specter: I so wish that was a game...or a game mod. I'd take either at this point.

@Toric: I figured she was so into roleplaying her character that she just did the gesture without thinking and the fiddlesticks was her realizing that she just sabotaged her own efforts unintentionally. I do agree that, if this is genuine frustration, that it's a little premature for it to be happening right now.
Disloyal Subject 14th Nov 2014, 3:26 PM edit delete reply
Disloyal Subject
You mean it's not an actual mod? Darn.
I agree that it's most likely IC, though I suppose she could have been under stress away from the game lately.
Moonstone 13th Nov 2014, 1:44 PM edit delete reply
Ohhh boy, my GM pulled this one on me hard once.

Essentially we were a low-level party storming an evil base, and one of the baddies showed up right toward the end of a battle, and someone's knowledge check let us know that he could cast Shatter. The GM had gone on for over a minute about the giant, sparkling chandelier hanging from the ceiling earlier, so I warned everyone that he was probably going to cast it on said chandelier.
The GM stared at me for a full minute. Then, in the voice of the baddie, "Well...that was not the plan before, but it is CERTAINLY the plan now!"
My party has yet to forgive me for the rain of glass and subsequent giant patch of glass 'caltrops' dominating 50% of the room.
Blueblade 14th Nov 2014, 7:56 PM edit delete reply
That awkward moment in which the heroes give the villain a really good idea that the villain originally didn't think of.
Blueblade 13th Nov 2014, 2:53 PM edit delete reply
Once I was trying to ask a question to some hobgoblins but the rest of the group interrupted me and the DM couldn't hear me and I was , out of character, trying to get the group to be quiet so I could tell the DM the question I wanted to ask. But once we stopped bickering he said the hobgoblins ran for the hallway to warn their army due to the groups bickering and counted my out of character attempts to get the group to be quiet so the DM could hear what I wanted to ask in character as me bickering with the group in character. However on the bright side it did lead to a little chase where my character cut a hobgoblins leg clean off moved on to the next one and put his sword right through the hob goblins chest and pull it out in one clean motion and the cutting off the leg of the goblin who a fellow party member then kill stealed. And despite all this I'm pretty sure my character is one of the most sane characters in the group despite a raging hatred towards bandits ,that's actually a bit like Powder Keg's hatred towards raiders, and an extremely fucked up backstory that happened when he was 6 and he is currently 14 . So yeah my group is mostly crazy.
Blueblade 14th Nov 2014, 1:39 PM edit delete reply
I never said it was a bad thing in fact it makes the campaign much more entertaining seeing how the DM has to deal with our shenanigans. YAY SHENANIGANS!
Disloyal Subject 14th Nov 2014, 3:33 PM edit delete reply
Disloyal Subject
Huzzah!
Freelance 13th Nov 2014, 3:07 PM edit delete reply
During my first character, one of our quests led us into the mountainside of a volcano. Along the way, one of our battles involved a banshee. Luckily, we defeated it without losing anybody to her shrieks, but it got close on a few rolls.
Later on we found some skeletal remains, and my character figured they were what's left of the poor soul that became it. Instead of letting one of our clerics consecrate/bless/allow the spirit to move on, my character hefted up the remains and then threw them into the magma flow.
Mass facepalming ensued, but hey, we no longer had to worry about the banshee!
Blueblade 13th Nov 2014, 3:09 PM edit delete reply
Always look for a silver lining! Or in this case a magma flow lining!
Blueblade 13th Nov 2014, 3:13 PM edit delete reply
Also... Rarity , or in this case "Luna" , has player rage... RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
XD
kriss1989 13th Nov 2014, 4:36 PM edit delete reply
kriss1989
My group has a hand sign we use for OOC stuff for just this reason. We also have the house rule that if you not use the sign, what you say is in character. I forgot to do it one time during a Dragon Age game however when, in the middle of a self congratulatory speech given by a noble we needed to ally with, and I muttered "What a blowhard." The DM roled and so the Duke overheard my comment. Now then, the smart thing to do would be to apologize and hope the diplomancer could salvage things. But nobody ever accused Martain, Mage Apologist, Elemental Eidolon, and Universal Buttmonkey, of being smart. So I decided to go for broke, tore his ego to shreds, and noted that the only reason we were being nice to him earlier was because we thought it would work, but it was taking way too long. Everyone was speechless.

Martain: "And you are going to smile, take the insults, and give us the army to fight this Blight anyway."
Duke: "And why would I do that?"
Martain: *transforms into a being of living fire and lightning* "Because I am sick and tired of your Maker damned political posing, and if you don't I'm dropping your whole castle into magma beneath the deep roads!" *rolls critical intimidate success*
DM: ...so yeah you guys got the army, and Duke *cant recall his name* got a new pair of pants.
Specter 14th Nov 2014, 12:19 AM edit delete reply
Specter
If I had dime where I wanted to talk back anyone, noble or peasant or whatever, I would be rich as hell (most of it would come from other pc's, but still), and for the fact it worked out for you, that much better.

I actually hope your army helped.
Disloyal Subject 15th Nov 2014, 1:12 AM edit delete reply
Disloyal Subject
Against Darkspawn, armies tend to be pretty handy, if somewhat... expendable.
What I want to know is how he effectively turned into an elemental; I don't remember anything like that for players in Origins. I assume it's unique to the RPG?
kriss1989 15th Nov 2014, 8:03 AM edit delete reply
kriss1989
Well...not really. They didn't add any new classes for the tabletop (way to be lazy), and none of the ones offered really fit my style. Arcane Warrior was out, my character wasn't getting into melee, that's what the dwarf and kunari were for! He definitely wasn't a spirit healer or blood Mage, and shape shifting had no appeal. My character specialized in elemental magic, but there was no class for that one school of magic. So, my GM home brewed one. Elemental Eidolon. Getting it gave me more practical elemental magic and the ability to coat myself in elemental energy (I don't actually transform, but I look bitchin' terrifying). All I have to do is occasionally offer duplications to all four elements so that their power stays in balance and I don't explode. Or implode. Depending on what element is out of balance.
A.A. Baker 13th Nov 2014, 5:19 PM edit delete reply
I was once playing a cross between fighter and a bard, essentially a commander type that was good at inspiring the troops. I was traveling with a party at the time including a paladin.
We ran into a camp of goblins who had taken people captive. We decided the best way to start was to lure them into the entrance to the forest clearing their camp was in. So the party rogue could sneak over and free the captives.
My commander type though the best way to start would be to active song of courage. Of course as a commander type my fighter/bard didn't use song or dance, but bolstering words. As a bit of role play fluff I had her shout out CHARGE! whenever she used song of courage. Unfortunately the paladin took this literally and the planned ambush went right out the window as he charged headlong into the camp. We still won the fight with no prisoner deaths, but it got mighty close.
McBehrer 13th Nov 2014, 8:05 PM edit delete reply
McBehrer
I believe the class you are looking for is "cavalier."
Disloyal Subject 14th Nov 2014, 3:32 PM edit delete reply
Disloyal Subject
I favor Knights, but it sounds like Baker was actually playing a Fighter/Bard multiclass. There's something to be said for restriction to core rulebooks; creative players' interpretations of the basic stuff tends to be more interesting to me than the more exotic options anyway.

edit: Darn it, I need to work on my reply placement. All this anachronic order is irritating.
Mykin 13th Nov 2014, 9:57 PM edit delete reply
Mykin
Or, you know, a warlord. Anyway, it's nice to actually see a story where someone charging into the middle of combat worked out perfectly in the end for all involved...minus the enemy naturally.
Blueblade 13th Nov 2014, 7:07 PM edit delete reply
CHAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGGGEEEEEEEE!
FOR NAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRNNNNNNNNIIIIIIIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!
PIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
XDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXDXD
Disloyal Subject 14th Nov 2014, 3:29 PM edit delete reply
Disloyal Subject
EEUUULAAAALLIIIAAA!
Blood and Thunder!
(Why are we typing bellowed warcries?)
Blueblade 14th Nov 2014, 7:33 PM edit delete reply
GEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNNIIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMOOOOOO!
(Because war cries are fun!)
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR CRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!
Blueblade 15th Nov 2014, 11:07 AM edit delete reply
YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!
(I have decided to put in a new shout everyday)
RC Nelson 13th Nov 2014, 7:59 PM edit delete reply
Ah, my favorite memory. We were playing old Changeling, and one of the characters was working off some frustration by banging on wood and metal. Naturally, the local nobility dislikes the noise. My character steps up, puts a beret on his head, and proceeds to talk up the construction as if it's a piece of fine art. I must have impressed our Storyteller, because the nobles went along with it and decorated it even more! :D
CuriousGuest 15th Nov 2014, 12:11 AM edit delete reply
I wonder how this arc's angle will go. Especially since Pinkie seems less into causing problems and senseless panic than the show version. I forsee the PM maybe getting carried away beating down on Luna/Rarity and the players calling them out on turning what should be a lighthearted side story into -another- stress filled dramafest. I wonder if the PM is secretly holding a grudge over them constantly ruining the first few plots. (Nightmare Moon, the dragon, parasprites) This could be an attempt to make an excuse to re-break Luna and bring back Nightmare Moon so they can use their original campaign idea from the beginning. The scene with Luna in the forest with Twilight could actually be the PM finally cracking and admitting that they're unhappy that they work so hard on trying to make interesting things for the players only to have them ignored or just annihilated by the players brute forcing their way through.