Page 51 - Mostly Ideal Outcome

3rd Dec 2011, 6:00 AM
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Mostly Ideal Outcome
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Author Notes:

Newbiespud 3rd Dec 2011, 6:00 AM edit delete
Newbiespud
The flavor description of Majestic Word reads:
You utter words laden with preternatural inspiration, restoring your ally's stamina and making wounds seem insignificant.

What inspiring word or phrase would a pony like Pinkie Pie use?

95 Comments:

Sparky 3rd Dec 2011, 6:06 AM edit delete reply
"This calls for a song!"
Anthonox 3rd Dec 2011, 6:10 AM edit delete reply
"What are you doing bleeding on the dungeon floor, silly?"
Aegis Steadfast 3rd Dec 2011, 6:18 AM edit delete reply
"Here, have a muffin!"
[witty name goes here] 13th Nov 2012, 9:30 PM edit delete reply
No, that's Derpy's Inspiring Word.
Kosine 3rd Dec 2011, 6:32 AM edit delete reply
"Your majestic word of the day is: 'FABULOUS'!"
Rad 3rd Dec 2011, 6:37 AM edit delete reply
"Cupcakes?"

Yeah, I just had to say it...
Ronrab 3rd Dec 2011, 6:41 AM edit delete reply
Utter utter utter!
LibraryGeek 3rd Dec 2011, 6:41 AM edit delete reply
"Making wounds seem insignificant". Seem, eh? Doesn't actually heal them up, just makes you ignore them and carry on for a bit. Useful when the option is being slaughtered, but otherwise I'd be concerned with worsening damage.
PikalaxALT 3rd Dec 2011, 7:17 AM edit delete reply
Being a non-player, I may make up some mechanics that don't actually exist.

PP: "Courage check, yay! *roll* 9, but (sing-song) I've got a natural fif-teeeeeEEEEEEeeeeen!!"

DM: "You giggle at the ghostie, and it fades away."
CocoaNut 3rd Dec 2011, 7:40 AM edit delete reply
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C-7OT5Bu7Wg

That's the one.
wite_c83 3rd Dec 2011, 10:01 AM edit delete reply
^this
Rytel 3rd Dec 2011, 8:24 AM edit delete reply
Wait a minute. "Making wounds seem insignificant?"

Am I reading this the wrong way, or do bards heal via placebo effect?
MirrorImage 3rd Dec 2011, 8:43 AM edit delete reply
No, they heal actual hit points. That's just the flavor text.
kriss1989 3rd Dec 2011, 9:15 AM edit delete reply
Actually, they technically do. However, since most HP doesn't represent actual physical damage until you get to the bloodied level, a placebo is just fine.
Kyletra 4th Dec 2011, 8:24 PM edit delete reply
How the 4e health works is a combination of physical and mental health, with some morale. Some healing effects, like potions, work on the body itself, while ones like Majestic Word are helping to give the courage to fight through the pain. Also helps Bard is an Arcane class, so the words do have some magic to them. Warlords and there Inspiring Words, however, are 100% morale boost, as it's a martial class.

Unless I'm forgetting something important.
kriss1989 3rd Dec 2011, 9:16 AM edit delete reply
PP: "Get up quck Rarity! You don't want to miss the treasure!"

Words that will get any rouge up.
Erin Palette 3rd Dec 2011, 11:02 AM edit delete reply
Also: "If you die we're taking your treasure."
HoshiHikara 5th Dec 2011, 10:14 AM edit delete reply
Don't Forget: "If you die, we're donating your share to orphans with no taste in fashion, who don't see anything wrong with wearing green plaid shirts with neon pink polkadots."
kriss1989 5th Dec 2011, 12:43 PM edit delete reply
"And socks that don't match even each other...on each of their four legs.
Syth 8th Jun 2013, 8:10 PM edit delete reply
^Made of win.
gjhorst 3rd Dec 2011, 9:32 AM edit delete reply
PARTY!
Robert 4th Dec 2011, 2:03 AM edit delete reply
It's her answer to EVERYTHING! How could it not be her Majestic Word?
GreyDuck 3rd Dec 2011, 10:06 AM edit delete reply
I don't know from ponies, but my Warlords (yes, I've played more than one) tend to use very silly Inspiring Words. "Sasquatch!" "Cummerbund!" "Onomatopoeia!"
Saddlesoap Opera 3rd Dec 2011, 11:40 AM edit delete reply
Yay! Warlords. AKA...Shouty Man! Shouty Man heals companions! WITH SHOUTING!

Oh, 4th edition...so insane.
Kyman201 3rd Dec 2011, 2:50 PM edit delete reply
I always liked to imagine that warlords act like Drill Sergeants.

"What're you doing bleeding on the floor you sissy little adventurer? Maybe we should just settle out a blanket and have a happy little picnic like a bunch of happy little halflings!"

"But I am a halfling!"

"NOT MY PROBLEM MAGGOT!"
Harashaw 3rd Dec 2011, 3:19 PM edit delete reply
How is a warlord any more insane than singy man who heals companions with singing?
kriss1989 5th Dec 2011, 12:44 PM edit delete reply
Cause the singer has magic, and the shouty man has 0% magic. The bard uses a magic song, the warlord uses normal words.
Enchanter Tim 3rd Dec 2011, 9:23 PM edit delete reply
So when playing a Warlord, you should pretend to be BRIAN BLESSED? :P
Newbiespud 3rd Dec 2011, 9:56 PM edit delete reply
Newbiespud
FFFFF-

That's it. Princess Luna is a Warlord. Headcanon.
Akouma 3rd Dec 2011, 10:53 PM edit delete reply
A friend of a friend played his Warlord's Inspiring Word (I'm pretty sure the Warlord's heal is called Inspiring Word) as just his character yelling "Good work, soldier!" and then cracking a gigantic cartoon smile that literally made a single glint in the light complete with cartoon tooth-glint sound effect. That was always my favorite version.
MirrorImage 4th Dec 2011, 9:36 AM edit delete reply
@Akouman - that's a great way to ruin a Stealth check in a dark cave.

"Dude heal me."
"Good job, soldier!" *sparkle*
'Hey mac, did you see that? I think adventurers are over there!'

Though all this is making me want to play a Bard or a Warlord again just for all the silliness I can pull with it now.
David 4th Dec 2011, 1:56 PM edit delete reply
That could get very weird.
"I just broke my leg accidentally!"
"Good job, soldier!" *sparkle*
"...so... it was good that I broke my leg? and it REALLY hurts..."
"GOOD JOB, SOLDIER!" *sparkle*
GuestM 6th Dec 2011, 3:33 AM edit delete reply
Royal Canterlot Pony heals companions! WITH ROYAL CANTERLOT VOICE!

I do think that this will be kinda hard to explain to http://mlp-headcanons.tumblr.com/
kriss1989 5th Dec 2011, 12:43 PM edit delete reply
I KNEW there was a reason I loved the class.
Bugsydor 5th Dec 2011, 8:01 PM edit delete reply
Better idea: BILLY MAYS HERE, AND I'M BEST WARLORD!
Darkside 4th Dec 2011, 5:35 PM edit delete reply
I made Kamina a Warlord, so he heals people by yelling inspirationally and punching them in the face.
Chris M 4th Dec 2011, 5:05 AM edit delete reply
One friend of mine had his warlord's Inspiring Word be something along the lines of "Get up, fool! You ain't hurt!" The rest of his powers were also along similar lines...
Duder-Skanks 3rd Dec 2011, 10:47 AM edit delete reply
"I have a Party Cannon with your name on it"
Guest 3rd Dec 2011, 11:42 AM edit delete reply
"You know, if you fall unconcious, you fall over. Wouldn't that get dirt in your mane?"

"I'M UP! I'M UP!"
terrycloth 3rd Dec 2011, 12:33 PM edit delete reply
"Woah! That was the most awesome roll I ever saw someone do after falling off a seventy foot cliff! The cliff was all like *crash* and we were all *AHHHH!* and then Rainbow swooped down and saved me like *wooosh* but you *totally* got to the ground before me! I bet you aren't hurt at all!"
Deckard Canine 4th Dec 2011, 11:14 AM edit delete reply
You win in my book.
Azureink 3rd Dec 2011, 1:07 PM edit delete reply
Azureink
Dash has yet to roll poorly after the failed attempt to follow NMM.
Akouma 3rd Dec 2011, 1:36 PM edit delete reply
Well, isn't that appropriate? I mean part of her character is that she's the best at most of what she does. Granted, she doesn't actually do a whole lot, but she's the best at them!
Raxon 14th Jun 2012, 4:39 PM edit delete reply
Does that mean that Rainbow Dash is Wolverine?
Marioaddict 1st Nov 2013, 6:17 PM edit delete reply
Haha! after many years of searching, I have found the fabled start of Raxon!

May your legend shine on for many generations!
guy 5th May 2014, 1:24 PM edit delete reply
Not quite. He shows up earlier in the archives. Keep trying!
JRKlein 5th Dec 2011, 5:14 PM edit delete reply
Loaded dice?
Twad 3rd Dec 2011, 1:35 PM edit delete reply
@Sparky

"This calls for a song"!

Gain health or roll SAN. Your call.
Limey Lassen 3rd Dec 2011, 10:41 PM edit delete reply
Limey Lassen
Huh, natural 1. Fancy that.

http://i.neoseeker.com/mgv/60953-Shadow%20of%20Death/953/102/twilightcrazy_display.gif
Laurence 3rd Dec 2011, 2:15 PM edit delete reply
Pinkie Pie: C'mon, Rarity, you aren't hurt that bad! I remember that one time, when the chimney sweep fell off the roof, and landed on his long brush in that really awkward manner, and it pierced his leg, and he was bleeding EVERYWHERE, and then the nurse ponies had the hardest time--
Rarity: If I stand up and pretend I'm not hurting at all, will you stop telling me your story? Please?!
Pinkie Pie: I suppose.
Lillith 3rd Dec 2011, 2:17 PM edit delete reply
PP's magical words: "Say Rarity, did I introduce you to my pal Tom?"
Torg 3rd Dec 2011, 3:07 PM edit delete reply
"Don't worry, those wounds happened offscreen."
HopeFox 3rd Dec 2011, 3:52 PM edit delete reply
"I'd lie on the ground bleeding
From every stab or fall
But Granny Pie said that wasn't the way
To deal with wounds at all!"
Twilight Sparkle 3rd Dec 2011, 4:46 PM edit delete reply
-_- She's not?
banjo2E 3rd Dec 2011, 4:44 PM edit delete reply
@author's notes: SURPRISE!
Trance 3rd Dec 2011, 6:23 PM edit delete reply
Pinkie: "By the will of Bob I command you to Paaartaaaay!"
((Bob is a lesser halfling god, of randomness and parties.))
or
Pinkie: "Rarity, if you don't get up Nightmare Moon is going to cover your dresses in mud."
Kuro Fox 3rd Dec 2011, 7:58 PM edit delete reply
"The flavor description of Majestic Word reads:
You utter words laden with preternatural inspiration, restoring your ally's stamina and making wounds seem insignificant."

So, it's a magic song/poem that works as a painkiller?
chaosGuitarist 3rd Dec 2011, 8:31 PM edit delete reply
No words. Only a party cannon.
Other Guest 3rd Dec 2011, 9:28 PM edit delete reply
This is Majestic Word and I hope it makes you well
Falling off that cliff it must have hurt like hell
But the damage rolled was low so that was very nice
Good thing I made the switch with my special loaded dice
Now my song will cheer you up and you can persevere
And when we're back in Ponyville I'll buy you lots of beer!
Colin 12th Dec 2011, 6:36 PM edit delete reply
Winner. :-D
Sharp Note 3rd Dec 2011, 11:18 PM edit delete reply
"Stand up friend and you will find, that the hurt's all in your mind! Now come on and give a cheer, six surges left; nothing to fear!"
Yeah, it's Pinkie so she would definitely break the fourth wall. Incidentally Sharp Note is a 4e Pegasus bard, so I have to think up these ALL THE TIME.
Some Random Guy 4th Dec 2011, 1:39 AM edit delete reply
"SPOOON!"?
kriss1989 5th Dec 2011, 12:46 PM edit delete reply
SPOOOOOOON!
xuincherguixe 4th Dec 2011, 4:09 AM edit delete reply
"I couldn't help but notice how you fell off that steep cliff
But if you keep your head we'll have you fixed up in a jiff
Tumbles and Falls aren't that drastic
No need to start acting spastic
The pain is all just in your head
So you don't have to fall over dead
It's not even that big a deal
Just stand up with new zeal"
Keystone 4th Dec 2011, 7:26 AM edit delete reply
...Did they invent a player class as an excuse for players to act like Gunnery Sargent Hartman off Full Metal Jacket?

"YOU HAVE NOT BEEN GIVEN PERMISSION TO DIE ON ME YOU MARSHMALLOW! NOW GET ON YOUR FEET!"

Also.

Party Cannon. No explaination needed.
Torg 4th Dec 2011, 9:35 AM edit delete reply
I will never think of a bard as a singer ever again.
kriss1989 5th Dec 2011, 5:38 AM edit delete reply
No no, Bards say magical words. WARLORDS are drill sergeants.
Akouma 4th Dec 2011, 12:10 PM edit delete reply
You know, Bards really are my favorite healing class. Mostly because they're the only one that's both REALLY GOOD and isn't meant to be roleplayed as someone with a rod up their spine. Because look at the options, here:

Cleric: Their primary attribute is unwavering devotion to any given god. Usually, they're very serious about it.
Warlord: Concerned with the lives of his/her men, calm and tactical.
Ardent: If you EVER bring an Ardent to a game I'm playing at so help me I can't be held responsible for what I might do in my fits of rage. It is the only class in the game that I can confidently say is just plain BAD, on top of not doing anything interesting that can't be done by a good healer class. I really, really hate Ardents.
Artificer: Can get whacky (yelling "Science!" every time you do anything helps), but is still *supposed* to be serious about their research and inventions.
Runepriest: They're too busy being badass to be wacky.
Shaman: If clerics were primal, you'd basically get this.
Then there's the Bard, who's whole shtick is having fun, and your having fun is what heals people.
TheDoomBug 4th Dec 2011, 5:43 PM edit delete reply
You must not hang out with enough lunatics because I can think of so many ways to be wacky with any of those classes. You can play a super uptight, right-wing extremist cleric as a joke or an alcoholic warlord who hates everyone, but they all think s/he's just using tough love. Roleplaying is about creativity.
xuincherguixe 5th Dec 2011, 3:59 AM edit delete reply
Any class can be interesting. Admittedly some are terribly written and require one to stretch their imagination. Rather than going for cliches, think about a characters motivation and why they do what they do.

One archetype I always enjoy is the socially responsible Necromancer. Who really wants to rule the world? With that in mind what's the point of starting a zombie apocalypse? If world domination wasn't already a questionable objective, ruling over a world of nothing but zombies is even more stupid. But amongst the souls of the dead resides unfathomable amounts of information. Animated corpses are well suited to hard labor too. And when some idiot comes along with an army of zombies? Well you're ready to ruin their "plans".

There's so many gods out there, Clerics have a pretty wide range. Judeo-Christian references got you down? Serve the Agenda instead of Thor, or Loki, or Cthulhu! Which leads me to another thought. Is it possible to play a Lawful Good Cleric of Cthulhu? Hmm. I need to think more on this, because that sounds like a fun character.

There's also a lot of concepts that sound great, but in practice are not. The Alcoholic Warlord seems like one of them. How's he going to bash the heads in of Orcs if he's always drinking? Also seems like eventually if it was a realistic character he'd realize what an ass he's been. I like to leave a place for my characters to grow, but if he gives up the sauce and starts treating the rest of the team mates with respect, what is there left to the character?

That being said, I like the idea of a guy like that who routinely drinks the encounters under the table.
"Hey Orc guarding a chest in a ten foot by ten foot room! I bet you're a light weight!"
"The Orc looks puzzled at you."
"Oh. Right. I say that in Orcish."
"He accepts your challenge. Roll fortitude saves!"
*several hours later*
"Okay. Prohibition is now in affect. You've managed to ruin the economy, turn the Black Dragon into an Alcoholic, and the Paladin now has Austrian Citizenship somehow."
"Would you believe this was my goal all along?"
"Yeah. Your distillation equipment explodes."
"Awww."
"The king is pressing charges."
modulusshift 5th Dec 2011, 6:08 PM edit delete reply
Lawful Good Cleric of Cthulu? That one line had me laughing more than everything but a certain drunk Celestia that I've read today.
But, seriously, how does that even work? Does the Cleric believe there are no other gods, so therefore he just does the best with the powers he can get?
xuincherguixe 6th Dec 2011, 1:40 AM edit delete reply
Yeah... like I said, I need to find a way to make it work. It's not what one would call easy.

For arguments sake, we'll presume this is a setting with pretty much all the gods. Our hypothetical cleric would assume that all of these other "gods" aren't really gods so much as very powerful outsiders. And uh... beneath the exterior is a harsh and cruel universe that doesn't care about anyone?

Hmm, doesn't really work because under that reasoning, those fake gods have managed to impose a reasonably livable world for corporeal three dimensional entities like our Cleric.


Uh.... The Cleric is crazy?
Shikome Kido Mi 7th Dec 2011, 12:53 AM edit delete reply
Cthulhu was here before mortal kinf and has prior claim to the planet, so we all just need to find a way to coexist under his rightful rule?

It's not Cthulhu's fault that being in his mere presence destroys mortal minds, he's just too awesome for most people to handle. No doubt it's all that benevolence.
Shikome Kido Mi 7th Dec 2011, 12:58 AM edit delete reply
Also, I don't know where you got the idea that any D&D universe isn't a chaotic mess of overpowered monsters barely kept in check by handfuls of adventurers.

Actually that realization alone, that all of civilization is a fragile illusion that could be ended by uncaring beasts at any time might have helped drive our theoretical Lawful Good cleric mad.
Raxon 22nd Jan 2012, 8:35 AM edit delete reply
Oh, that's easy.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm preparing your soul to go meet Lord Cthulhu! It'll be so glorious!"

"... Oh, look at that, I guess I'm not so badly injured after all. Hey, I can even walk. I guess there's no need to prepare my soul for Cthulhu."

"Are you sure? Maybe I could arrange for a short visit."

"No no, that's quite alright, I'm feeling much better now, but thank you for the offer."

I'm the kind of guy you really have to watch out for. I can play a lawful good paladin who is a devious, underhanded prick. And I'm good at it.
Lyntermas 4th Dec 2011, 1:01 PM edit delete reply
PP: Come on, Rarity. There's probably lots of treasure at the castle.
Rarity: Pinkie, I'm not going to heal my real wounds over hypothetical treasure in an abandoned castle.
PP: Oh, I guess you're right. Probably not much left except maybe a deed or two.
Rarity:...Deeds?
PP: Yeah, boring old legal documents giving useless plots of land to whoever possesses them. I mean, I guess that they would give a title of nobility, but who's really interested in...
Rarity: MINE!!! *rushes off*
PP: Just as Pinkie planned.
Hellioning 5th Dec 2011, 4:21 PM edit delete reply
...Is it wrong that I just noticed this is a goddamn terrible party? I don't mean terrible as in "not optimized" I mean terrible as in "where the hell is your Defender?"

I mean, I guess Rainbow can be the party tank but she seems more about murder then defense...
Matev 5th Dec 2011, 5:22 PM edit delete reply
3 strikers should be able to sufficiently MDK a monster or 2 a turn so long as the healers keep topping them up.
Azureink 5th Dec 2011, 5:24 PM edit delete reply
Azureink
Actually I think two Leaders, two Strikers, and 2 Controllers would actually do pretty well in 4e.
MirrorImage 5th Dec 2011, 8:43 PM edit delete reply
Depends on how many meatshields are in the way. The Defender isn't explicitly supposed to be the tank, but the distraction, which is why the new Fighter (the Essentials fighter) automatically "marks" any enemy its adjacent to without having to specifically attack them. Good luck getting to the big bad safely if there's a bunch of monsters in your way.
Akouma 5th Dec 2011, 8:48 PM edit delete reply
Defenders only become really necessary a few levels in when monster damage starts escalating. Also, Barbarians make really good off-tanks since they are highly mobile, have CON as one of their primary attributes, and have a decent amount of natural HP and temp-HP gain. Whether or not Rainbow's *player* is going to be catty and annoying when the DM decides "well the big, aggressive lady who's wrecking everything would be the logical choice for a group of scared monsters to gang up on", thus allowing her to fill her secondary defender role. Seriously if you play a Barbarian and keep trying to run up and maul an unmarked monster, HE'S GOING TO ATTACK YOU BACK, DAMMIT. Oh wait just remembered that my player that does this doesn't read this comic. Point still remains, if your DM is having a monster that isn't marked by a defender attack you the turn after you attack it, you have no right to complain that the monster is behaving like a logical, thinking creature.
Maura 5th Dec 2011, 8:46 PM edit delete reply
My manic sorceror/bard multiclass' healing words were always: "Feel better!"

Maybe not the most inspiring words, but I quite liked the hint of unspoken threat at then end of it.
kriss1989 5th Dec 2011, 9:24 PM edit delete reply
Huh, our parties cleric/wizard uses the same phrase. Of course, she's only 9 years old. Her faith is the simple faith of a child.
TaraSwanwing 13th Mar 2012, 7:07 PM edit delete reply
Ah, trust and teamwork.(stabs self in head) Story time!
The druid-barbarian-sorceress-cleric party is resting on top of a giant spire with a heaping pile of loot. We've each divided the treasure up, and the druid's busy reading through this magic book (yet another tale), and everyone one else is trying to figure out what their stuff does.
Now, the cleric, a Gnoll priestess of Gorrum, is checking out two bags. One is a Bag of Holding. The other looks like a bag of holding. So the cleric sticks her hand in, and pulls out a rock. She sticks her hand in again, and pulls out an ice cube. She sticks her hand in AGAIN, and pulls out an ice cube. By now the sorceress has noticed her, and she come over and inspects the bag. She pulls a few things out of it and determines that it is a Bag of Devouring. She warns everyone not to use it, and puts it in her belt.
Late at night, the Cleric, Ribash, goes over and gets the bag. She then puts her arm in the bag.
Up until then, the catchphrase had been "Kreyjak Smart!", referring to the time the druid, controlled by the player who plays Ribash, cast a lightening spell on a lightening-resistant demon. Now...let me finish the story.
This time something grabs Ribash's arm and tries to pull her in. She starts screaming for the others, and they wake up and pull her out. Then she tries to put her arm in AGAIN. Once again, it grabs her, and the barbarian, sworn to protect her, tells the druid that if he can't pull her out, he's to cut Ribash's arm off. The sorceress is pulling the bag away, the cleric's tugging futily, the barbarian's raging, and after one last try...I cut Ribash's arm off. She tried to put her other arm in. The barbarian whapped her over the head, and then chucked the bag out over the air, while the druid cast Flame Strike on it, the sorceress cast Fireball, the Mina bird copied the fireball, and the barbarian threw his hammer at it. It. Barely. Dented it.
Ribash currently has a stump on her right-hand. So our new catchphrase is
"RIBASH VERY VERY STUPID!!!"
The Marvellous Mister Mae 12th Apr 2012, 3:12 AM edit delete reply
Stop making Fluttershy useless ;~;
Tatsurou 30th Nov 2012, 10:49 PM edit delete reply
"I know you're feeling all beaten, battered,
This fall has left you torn and tattered,
But don't give up! Get on your feet!
THis is a challenge we're sure to beat!
You get knocked down!
But you get up again!
Ain't nothing gonna keep you down!"

She sings it.
Tech 4th Dec 2013, 11:59 PM edit delete reply
So, she sings Tubthumping, then?
Eli 1st Dec 2012, 4:11 PM edit delete reply
"Don't believe in yourself. Believe in Pinkie, who believes in you!"
Tech 4th Dec 2013, 11:58 PM edit delete reply
"If you don't get your fat ass up, it'll be the worse for you."
A bomb of food 2nd Jan 2014, 12:34 AM edit delete reply
She said."Rarity, you've got to stand up strong!"
Guest 19th May 2014, 9:12 AM edit delete reply
"Did you know that pony's/horses with a broken leg get put down?"
Raxon 24th Sep 2014, 11:45 PM edit delete reply
Raxon
"Hey Rarity, you know what I like to do with injured mares, right?"

"I'M ALL BETTER NOW!"
Anonymous 1st Jan 2015, 3:54 PM edit delete reply
Our party has a Warlord, whose words of inspiration and healing are "rub some dirt in it!".
Elou 28th Nov 2015, 11:19 AM edit delete reply
You're number has come up.
Chet_Manley 17th Dec 2015, 1:35 PM edit delete reply
This was one I used on my brother when he fell into despair ala demon cherub thing.
"Snap out of it man, think of the bitches."