Page 497 - Recursion, Not Inception

30th Sep 2014, 6:00 AM
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Recursion, Not Inception
Average Rating: 5 (5 votes)
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Author Notes:

Newbiespud 30th Sep 2014, 6:00 AM edit delete
Newbiespud
Watching the episode again, Spike's throwaway line in this scene is: "Are you that one creaky grandpa from Ponyville Retirement Village?"

So here's a crack fanfic idea for ya: That one creaky grandpa IS an immortal Star Swirl the Bearded leading a quiet life. FANFIC COMBO: It isn't actually Star Swirl, but a kooky old man who emphatically believes he is. TRIPLE WORD SCORE: It actually is him, but he's so old he forgets now and then.

Cut, print, off to FiMFiction's featured list. (Not Equestria Daily, though. It wouldn't stand a chance.)

86 Comments:

Raxon 30th Sep 2014, 6:01 AM edit delete reply
Raxon
Starswirl is actually Hayseed Turniptruck.

Blue collar wizards have very powerful magic.

His familiar is a coon dog.
Akouma 30th Sep 2014, 10:35 AM edit delete reply
Akouma
My sister actually had a character in nWoD Mage that was just an ungodly dumb hick with max ranks in Forces magic to blow stuff up.
Clutched by an Angel 30th Sep 2014, 11:34 AM edit delete reply
REALLY thought that said corn dog for a second.
Digo 30th Sep 2014, 12:31 PM edit delete reply
Well, it is Raxon. He'd know how to make a corn dog work. :)
Raxon 30th Sep 2014, 3:18 PM edit delete reply
Raxon
Hmmm... This gives me some ideas for custom familiars, a la Toriko.

So, here's what I got. It's a dog, with giant corn kernels all over its body. Once a week, it sheds its kernels, and begins growing new ones. The corn kernels give you a stack with everything +1 buff that lasts for two hours. There are enough kernels to feed a party of six for a full day, rationed out, it means three hours of +1 per person a week. For a party of six.
Robin Bobcat 30th Sep 2014, 5:23 PM edit delete reply
Naaah.. For a proper mind-screw, it has to be an actual corn dog.

Power granted by having it as a familiar: Being able to hide a quarterstaff on one's person, without injury.
Raxon 1st Oct 2014, 5:34 PM edit delete reply
Raxon
How about the corndog stick is the familiar, and it regenerates the corndog 1d4 times per day? The familiar can magically become a +3 quarterstaff on command.

Really, I just want this so we can recreate this scene.
Gden 30th Sep 2014, 7:47 PM edit delete reply
Back when I played a Mutants & Masterminds game (back when my friends still wanted to play it), I played with a guy who was playing a character named "The Stalker". He was invisible, and threw explosive objects that he claimed were corn cobs, that grew off his back. (obviously, as he was invisible, we couldn't tell if it was true, guess i forgot to mention his invisibility was permanent.)
Disloyal Subject 1st Oct 2014, 5:46 PM edit delete reply
Disloyal Subject
No collar sorcerers > blue collar wizards > white collar sorcerers > no collar wizards > white collar wizards > blue collar sorcerers?
Digo 30th Sep 2014, 6:17 AM edit delete reply
Spud, your crack fanfic idea reminds me of the comedy-horror movie Bubba Ho-Tep. Crazy old guy in a retirement home says he's Elvis, and joins up with another crazy old guy who claims he's JFK (played by Ossie Davis, so figure that one out) to fight off a mummy. :D
Curb 30th Sep 2014, 7:59 AM edit delete reply
I've seen Bubby Ho-Tep. JFK was dyed black by the CIA so no one would believe him, or that's what he keeps saying.
CharginChuck 30th Sep 2014, 11:50 AM edit delete reply
CharginChuck
I love that movie. My personal theory is that one of them is telling the truth, and the other is just crazy. Couldn't tell you which is which though.
kriss1989 1st Oct 2014, 9:59 AM edit delete reply
kriss1989
I personally believe both of them. Also, one of the best dumb movies ever.
TurretBot 10th Jan 2015, 7:35 PM edit delete reply
That sounds like a good movie, I'd watch it.

Also why this movie
Guest 30th Sep 2014, 6:18 AM edit delete reply
"Recursion, Not Inception"

THANK YOU!

It's one of my least favourite memes, which recently led me to quip to someone "You keep using that suffix. I do not think it means what you think it means."
Grollo 30th Sep 2014, 12:22 PM edit delete reply
Yes, so much this.
kriss1989 1st Oct 2014, 9:57 AM edit delete reply
kriss1989
Hallelujah! I am so tired of people getting this wrong.
Venellian 30th Sep 2014, 6:40 AM edit delete reply
If Spike were to be eaten by a dragon while wearing that costume...
Dragon-ception?
you know that guy 30th Sep 2014, 6:55 AM edit delete reply
No, dragon-ception means something for which Spike is too young.
Grollo 30th Sep 2014, 12:23 PM edit delete reply
*Recursion - see the title of the comic.
Venellian 30th Sep 2014, 1:24 PM edit delete reply
But wouldn't dragon-ception be a dragon inside a dragon inside a dragon?
McBehrer 30th Sep 2014, 1:27 PM edit delete reply
McBehrer
No, that's recursion. Inception, as explained in detail in the movie, is the creation of an idea or concept. Dream-with-a-dream has nothing to do with the term inception at all.
Guest 1st Oct 2014, 1:22 PM edit delete reply
Not only does the title of said movie not directly refer to the main 'quirk' of the movie, but I'm pretty sure 'YKTG' was referring to Dragon-Conception.
There's more than one word ending in -ception, after all.
Venellian 1st Oct 2014, 10:34 PM edit delete reply
So this is the inception of Dracursion, then.
kriss1989 2nd Oct 2014, 7:20 AM edit delete reply
kriss1989
...yes actually.
you know that guy 30th Sep 2014, 6:59 AM edit delete reply
I was going to write something like "Starswirl the Bearded was actually older than Celestia, when he was alive" but then I remembered that was from a Star Trek crossover fic and not canon.
Guest 30th Sep 2014, 8:14 AM edit delete reply
It's still strongly implied by canon. 'Tia seemed to be fairly young when she was doing the whole secret mirror romance thing, whereas Starswirl was not young, and anyway his student Clover was out and accomplishing stuff before 'Tia had even arrived in Equestria.
you know that guy 2nd Oct 2014, 12:21 AM edit delete reply
Wait, what is this? Secret mirror romance? Student clover? Did I miss some episodes or forget about them?
Jennifer 2nd Oct 2014, 5:22 AM edit delete reply
Clover is played by Twilight in the Founding of Equestria pageant episode, in which she says she was Star Swirl's student but Celestia does not appear. I'm not sure about the secret mirror romance thing either - fanfic?
GrayGriffin 30th Sep 2014, 8:20 AM edit delete reply
Actually, the Journal of the Two Sisters seems to imply that as well. Although Starswirl also mucks around with age-changing magic in there, so who knows.
Digo 30th Sep 2014, 9:59 AM edit delete reply
I'm suddenly looking at an interesting idea that Celestia used Starswirl's age spells to keep herself immortal for a 1000 years so she could be reunited with her sister... that makes a decent amount of sense.
kriss1989 1st Oct 2014, 9:11 AM edit delete reply
kriss1989
...so does that mean that, now reunited, they're going to let themselves grow old and die?
Disloyal Subject 1st Oct 2014, 5:59 PM edit delete reply
Disloyal Subject
My guess would be that, given their sense of duty, that depends on their faith in their subjects' ability to get by without them.
...huh. That casts grooming Twilight for princesshood in a new light.
Classic Steve 30th Sep 2014, 7:04 AM edit delete reply
Maybe Mr. Wattle was speaking at the creaky grandpa's funeral when Sweetie Belle interrupted.
Super_Big_Mac 30th Sep 2014, 7:11 AM edit delete reply
Triple word score? Here's a Yahtzee good ya: that creaky old pony is an almost-immortal, senile Star Swirl, and he thinks that he's Old Mare Hindrance, and runs around fighting Cthulu and his ilk.
Mykin 30th Sep 2014, 8:34 AM edit delete reply
Mykin
Heh, I throw a Small Straight in there: He drags Trixie along with him, mistakenly thinking her to be his long lost sidekick, while she attempts to get him to remember that he really is Starswirl The Bearded (If only for the reason that would make her more famous than just being the sidekick of Old Mare Hindrance.)
Digo 30th Sep 2014, 10:00 AM edit delete reply
Throwing Trixie into the idea? I approve!
Mykin 30th Sep 2014, 10:08 AM edit delete reply
Mykin
It just didn't feel right to not include her with all this madness, you know?
Grant 30th Sep 2014, 11:28 AM edit delete reply
And it turns out that Trixie is actually one half of his reincarnation, and she wants to split her inherited power with his half so she can stop having visions of the future.

Yeah I'm ripping off CLAMP.
Mykin 30th Sep 2014, 1:41 PM edit delete reply
Mykin
As long as it makes more sense than that show did, I'm fine with that. I'm still trying to figure out the flowchart that came with that show...
Malroth 30th Sep 2014, 4:22 PM edit delete reply
Tsubasa Reservoir chronicles?
Mykin 30th Sep 2014, 4:44 PM edit delete reply
Mykin
Yep.
Grant 30th Sep 2014, 6:51 PM edit delete reply
Well the one half of a reincarnation thing is from Cardcaptor Sakura, but the incomprehensible plot that involves clones, reincarnation and who knows what else is Tsubasa.
Raxon 30th Sep 2014, 11:14 PM edit delete reply
Raxon
OH! I love Cardcaptor Sakura!

But the japanese, not the english. What the hell is up with changing the kids and cute things' voices from cute to pack a day smokers?
kriss1989 1st Oct 2014, 9:12 AM edit delete reply
kriss1989
And they removed the lesbians.
Malroth 1st Oct 2014, 11:08 AM edit delete reply
time to play "Song of storm and fire" Again Tsubasa had some absolutely incredible music.
Specter 30th Sep 2014, 8:13 AM edit delete reply
Specter
... (Blink) (Blink)

It seems pretty obvious I missed something here... I'll assume it's because I just got up and can barely see 2 feet in front of me.

Either way, I am a fan of fan-fics (not intended as a pun (which is bad)). I've read/ seen like 2.5/.? fics so far.

... Here's one of them.
Digo 30th Sep 2014, 10:01 AM edit delete reply
Wait, you only read 2.5 fics? O_o
Specter 30th Sep 2014, 10:21 AM edit delete reply
Specter
read/watched, and 2.5.?.

I've read Fallout Equestria starring Little Pip, seen Snowdrop from Silly Filly Studios (I am vulnerable to tear jerkers... I liked it.), I am part way through Fallout Equestria: Project Horizon (which is the .5 part), and the link above which is essentially a Fan-fic... just in video game form (and I have no idea how long it will take, so "?").
Disloyal Subject 30th Sep 2014, 10:59 AM edit delete reply
Disloyal Subject
Much to read you still have.
I've yet to tackle Fallout: Equestria, aside from checking up on written summaries of Fallout is Dragons every so often, but Spud linked Diary of an Evil Pony a while back, and I'd reccomend it. For brevity's sake I'll stop my linking there.
Anyone here reading My Little Castlevania?
Raxon 30th Sep 2014, 12:13 PM edit delete reply
Digo 30th Sep 2014, 12:34 PM edit delete reply
Ah okay. Your math checks out.
Mykin 30th Sep 2014, 1:40 PM edit delete reply
Mykin
@Specter: I'm in the same boat at the moment except I've yet to see Snowdrop at the moment. I've mostly just been listening to two Doctor Whooves stuff so far (Doctor Whooves and Assistant from Ponies With Pockets and Doctor Whooves Adventure from Pony in a Box...I think)as that's really the only thing I can do while I'm stuck doing other stuff lately.

@Raxon: How? How did I miss that from Snowflame?!...Oh sorry, I mean SNOOOWFLAAAME!!!

...But I guess I'll add those to the bucket list as well. Seriously, I'm never going to get done with all of this now am I?
Raxon 30th Sep 2014, 3:19 PM edit delete reply
Raxon
Are you also an AT4W fan?
Mykin 30th Sep 2014, 4:14 PM edit delete reply
Mykin
@Raxon: The fact that I know about snowflame should be evidence enough that I am a fan of Mr. Linkara and anything related to his work.
Raxon 30th Sep 2014, 5:43 PM edit delete reply
Raxon
Speaking of the awesome that is SNOOOOOWFLAAAAAAME, have you read the Snowflame webcomic?
j-eagle12212012 30th Sep 2014, 2:32 PM edit delete reply
j-eagle12212012
May I suggest checking out the Ask Littlepip tumblr blog, it is as canon as can be (the blog mod consults with KKat and She has given the blog her approvel)
legomaniack 30th Sep 2014, 6:47 PM edit delete reply
legomaniack
While we're suggesting things (I highly recommend Asklittlepip as well), please, please, read Fallout Equestria: Murky Number Seven at some point. Amazingly written. Mind the feels though, if Snowdrop got you good...
Raxon 30th Sep 2014, 10:57 PM edit delete reply
Raxon
Has anyone mentioned Moonstuck yet?
Super_Big_Mac 30th Sep 2014, 11:48 PM edit delete reply
Super_Big_Mac
*Murky Number 7/10*
It's written fairly well, I guess, but there's quite a few spelling errors throughout, and the "feels" just got me exasperated instead of feels-y. "Oh waaah, boo hoo, woe is me, all I'm good for is being a slave, waaah! I want my life to change but I'm not gonna do anything but whine and bitch and moan!"

It got RRRREEEAAALLY annoying, really effin' fast. I stopped reading it sometime after he'd been recaptured after going through the Stable.
Raxon 1st Oct 2014, 1:12 AM edit delete reply
Raxon
General rule of thumb is that any story requiring me to feel sorry for the main character is going to result in me laughing cruelly, not garnering a surge of feels.

Then again, I don't care about whiny characters who never do anything about their terrible situations.
Super_Big_Mac 1st Oct 2014, 11:37 AM edit delete reply
I like drama and feels. Murky is just boring. His tears have no flavor.
kriss1989 1st Oct 2014, 9:17 AM edit delete reply
kriss1989
2.5 fics? *looks at own list of 563 favorite fics* *goes to FiMFiction and adds that list to the other* If you read one fanfiction a day, it would take you over three years to read as many Fanfics as I have favorited up to this day. It would take you over five years to match the number of Fanfics I have read in total.
legomaniack 1st Oct 2014, 3:56 PM edit delete reply
legomaniack
To each their own I guess. I enjoyed it.

To be fair though, I haven't read the opening chapters in a over a year, so maybe I've got rose tinted glasses on. The newest group of chapters are entertaining though, I know that much.
you know that guy 2nd Oct 2014, 12:33 AM edit delete reply
I'll watch most videos based on ponies. Friendship is Witchcraft, Ultra Fast Pony, and I'm about halfway through that Phoenix Wright in Equestria visualnovel-style film series.

My favorite and only fanfic I've read though is the Disqord Continuum, and its related stories.
Anvildude 9th Oct 2014, 4:30 PM edit delete reply
Dang. Maybe I _do_ read too much.

Let's see...

I've read pretty much every Dresden Files MLP crossover out there, the one where Robotnic turns into a pony, FO:E, Mahou Shojo Lyrical Twilight, A Mighty Demon Slayer Grooms some Ponies (as well as a few other G1 crossovers- some of those are fantastic!)- that one where Rarity falls asleep for a thousand years (Milleneum Wake?), THE DnD/MLP crossover extravaganza of the century, known as MyStara Little Pony: Friendship is Adventuring, along with countless others.

And that's not even touching the piece dé resistánce, Austraeou (and its sequels.

Seriously, Austraeou is fantastic. It's frikkin' ART.

And MyStara Little Pony is hilarious, and one of the best pieces of worldbuilding/ pony-human romance I've ever seen.
SSky 30th Sep 2014, 10:21 AM edit delete reply
That would have flown in season 1-2. I got my crappy sea pony fanfic on EQD back them
terrycloth 30th Sep 2014, 11:24 AM edit delete reply
Starswirl is actually Chrysalis. His unfinished spell *really* backfired, and his lack of friendship was amplified into a sucking black hole of love.
Disloyal Subject 1st Oct 2014, 6:06 PM edit delete reply
Disloyal Subject
Starswirl as the inadvertent progenitor of the Changeling race? I like it.
I have a hard time seeing Chrysalis as the first Changeling queen, though, largely because I assume their culture to be a matriarchal blend of Starcraft's Zerg and D&D's Drow - few could survive a full millennium at the head of such a cutthroat society. Granted, that's all conjecture, but I like it. (Up until now I'd decided they were the product of a failed supersoldier program run by Celestia's generals without her knowledge.)
Grant 30th Sep 2014, 11:35 AM edit delete reply
Something occurred to me. Spike is a dragon. It's made clear in the show that dragons become aggressive, greedy and very dangerous creatures when start getting an obsession with treasure. And his character is sidekick to a party that includes a Rogue.

Okay, ex-Rogue but basically still some kind of character who has the general definition of wanting to use wits and tricks to get a lot of wealth.

Furthermore, he has an open crush on her. I don't know if that means she's the strongest PC in the game, or the most endangered.
Toric 30th Sep 2014, 12:28 PM edit delete reply
Insert clever screenshot from "Secret of My Excess" here
Joural 30th Sep 2014, 4:35 PM edit delete reply
You could get it in if you made it a sequel to an otherwise unrelated story(looking at you, Life and Times of a Winning Pony) or if you were already well known.

EQD's fanfic section isn't exactly... discerning? competently run? professional?

What word am I looking for here?
Mykin 30th Sep 2014, 4:50 PM edit delete reply
Mykin
Picky? Adept? Savvy? Astute?.....Perspicacious?

I'm not sure exactly how deep into the Thesaurus I should be going so let me know if I'm anywhere near the ballpark here.
Newbiespud 30th Sep 2014, 7:19 PM edit delete reply
Newbiespud
Personally, I've never had much of a problem with EQD's unprofessional inconsistency. That might be because I've been told I can be a ridiculously patient person. I dislike having all my stuff both for the comic and the podcast marginalized to the Roundup, but I know it's not always front-page material. (What happens for the 500th page anniversary is going to be interesting on that front.)
Super_Big_Mac 1st Oct 2014, 12:05 AM edit delete reply
Super_Big_Mac
For me, it's just the sheer lack of motivation they seem to have when it comes to prereading and screening fics. A friend of mine tried to submit his fic, which is a pretty damn good fic if I do say so myself crossing MLP and Skyrim, at the time of Equestria's Founding. It's stuck with lore mostly from Skyrim, but using its assets from MLP with pleasure, such as exchanging Whiterun for Trottingham, and The City of Everfree instead of Solitude, with the Rainbow Palace.

It was failed for "failed use of first person" (The first chapter or two aren't even in first person; they're in 3rd person omnipresent), having "too 'wooden' of a main OC" (The main character is drugged, meaning he's acting in a haze of dulled senses and nearly insensate to begin with, so being 'wooden' should be a given), and the third thing was a lack of Trixie. The guy might've added that one on as a joke, but joke or no, it's stupid and irrelevant, and the entire review was completely wrong.

And that's only thing #1! Thing #2 is that that same friend of mine (Marik_Azemus) had drawn a pic of Octavia playing a guitar, and had titled it "Rocktavia." This was a while ago, like last year or before. EqD put it in their Weekly Round-up, and it was the only art piece that didn't have a credited author. It wasn't even linked to the DeviantArt image, it was simply posted with nothing to it except the title "Rocktavia."

I'd contacted my friend, letting him know. He asked me to send them a message to ask about getting his name put up; some views on his DA would probably help him get commissions and the like, yeah? So I did so. And their reply was to take it down, and post a message saying the artist was a douche and had bitched about the image being up and had sent their friends to attack and be dicks, so they pulled it, and made a big deal about how troublesome we were being and how rude we were. They even included my FiMFic username, as I'd signed the email with it, and I'd sent only a SINGLE email linking the image on DA and his DA profile and saying "Hey, it's cool to see my friend's art up! I was wondering if you could credit him, please?"

So yeah, that's my rage/sob story about why I get irritable whenever that site is brought up.
Digo 1st Oct 2014, 4:52 AM edit delete reply
I suppose it's better than no mention at all. :)
Raxon 1st Oct 2014, 5:35 AM edit delete reply
Raxon
Theoretically, it is.
kriss1989 1st Oct 2014, 9:20 AM edit delete reply
kriss1989
Just like, theoretically, death by space vacuume would hurt less than death via crucifixion.
Raxon 1st Oct 2014, 3:20 PM edit delete reply
Raxon
Hmmm... Thank you, kriss. You've given me an idea for a new villain. One who decides to determine the most evil people in history by recreating their execution styles, and measuring the brain activity of the victims to determine which method was most painful.

He'll need large test pools, naturally, to determine an average pain tolerange, and he'll also need to use a varied number, men, women, blacks, whites, asians, gay, straight, bi, ablebodied, and the disabled, both mentally and physically.

Everyone must be represented. Crucifixion, suffocation, beheading, crushed under stones, put inside a bronze bull and roasted, gassing, stabbing, shooting, exsanguination, etc. He'll need a pool of maybe 500 per category. And he'll need further testing, because he'll need to separate white males from black males, and male sufferers of mental illnesses from female sufferers, and he'll need to collect a sample pool for every mental illness he can find, as well as all the disabilities he can find.

All for determining the most evil regime in history, so he can rally people against them.

By the time he's done, I'm pretty sure he'll be considered history's greatest monster.
Disloyal Subject 1st Oct 2014, 6:13 PM edit delete reply
Disloyal Subject
...heavens forgive me, I like it. That sounds like a great sociopath. Kinda reminds me of a Techpriest I recently read about, scarily enough.
And don't forget rolling through cobblestone streets in a nail-studded barrel. I love the Brothers Grimm's fairy tales. Oh, and drawing and quartering, and stretching on the rack, and...
Raxon 1st Oct 2014, 6:53 PM edit delete reply
Raxon
Yes. Before he's done, he would probably have to leave the US to find other countries, because there simply aren't enough people for his experiments, especially minorities.

I'm not exagerrating. The numbers required for experimenting on every mental illness alone, 500 each per race/gender/age combination, would devastate minorities and the poor.

On top of that, then he has to test with mixed mental illnesses, like bipolar and SADS, for example, and something like SADS needs to be tested both durind the depression phase, and the normal phase. Same with Bipolar. So just for white males alone, that's something like four thousand people per execution method, for a single demographic, for only two mental illnesses.

He could easily entirely depopulate America, Europe, and Africa with this. It is very hard to find someone without at least something to make them slightly less than physical perfection.
Mykin 1st Oct 2014, 8:54 PM edit delete reply
Mykin
I'm pretty sure I remember reading about a Nazi scientist that basically did what you are describing here Raxon. Pretty much grabbed anyone and everyone he could get his hands on to perform sadistic experiments like the ones you've described simply out of morbid curiosity. Heck, it was so bad that his assistant burned all his research notes because he was so disgusted with it all. Vaguely remember the details though so take what I said with a grain of salt.
Raxon 1st Oct 2014, 10:01 PM edit delete reply
Raxon
Yeah, but imagine something like two million people, just to get an accurate measurement on crucifixion is before moving on to the next form of execution. Bear in mind that this guy isn't a bigot, he's not fighting a war, and he's not trying to purge the world of anyone in particular. He's just an extremely thorough serial killer who thinks he's doing this to stop evil.

We are talking top shelf crazy here.

And if you're not describing Dr. Mengele, then congrats, you have found someone possibly more horrifying. Bear in mind that this dude has entire research groups dedicated to handicapped. If he has to inflict these disabilities, he will. Among these disabilities he tests are paraplegics, folks with Cerebral Palsy, and cancer sufferers.

To be fair, it's not too long before the most horrible monster in the world is revealed. Shame fifty million people had to die before it became widespread enough the monster to be found.
kriss1989 2nd Oct 2014, 7:25 AM edit delete reply
kriss1989
No, the scary part is Mengele did legitimate scientific medical research to the point where people actually debate whether or not to use his research results for medical study or not, because the results are useful but the method is horrifying.
Anvildude 9th Oct 2014, 4:38 PM edit delete reply
It's interesting, isn't it, that for true Science to be done on any subject regarding the human race, the person doing the tests basically has to be a major psychotic and psychopath.

I mean, think about it. You know how we know so much about laboratory mice? because we clone them, raise the clones in very specific, sparse conditions, dissect them and torture them and test potentially lethal allergens and radiation doses and medications on them, grow body parts out of them that shouldn't be there, interrupt their development cycles, administer brain-changing chemical regimens...

All the while, testing them in a manner that GLadOS would be familiar with.

You want to know all about humans?
Steel Resolve 1st Oct 2014, 12:59 AM edit delete reply
Yo Dawg. We heard you like dragons.