Page 395 - Monthly Pie-a-thon

28th Jan 2014, 6:00 AM
Monthly Pie-a-thon
Average Rating: 5 (4 votes)
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Author Notes:

Newbiespud 28th Jan 2014, 6:00 AM edit delete
Newbiespud
When in doubt, the classics.

Sparingly. Very sparingly.

In other news: I present to you the second episode of Fallout is Dragons. The podcast has a Tumblr now, which I suspect will become the main hub for it. Many thanks to reader Great Dinn for his diligent work on all that - I take no credit.

74 Comments:

Mabbz 28th Jan 2014, 6:02 AM edit delete reply
I suppose it had to happen eventually...

Story time! Most hilarious/terrible reference joke in an RP!
Hrmm... 28th Jan 2014, 6:04 AM edit delete reply
Well, not an RP session, but my wife and I were watching an episode of Wheel of Fortune. She guessed, for the final puzzle, "I crush you!"

Perfect Russian accent and all. The best part? It fit the available letters perfectly.

Sadly, it was not the solution to the puzzle. So much of me wish that it had been, however.
Digo 28th Jan 2014, 6:17 AM edit delete reply
It would be difficult to decide what was the most hilarious reference. We've done it all though; Monty Python, Star Wars, even referenced Hellsing Abridged.

Well, I know one reference that made me spittake was a scene where the PCs broke into the king's throne room because the captain of the guard was the BBEG planning to assasinate the king and blame a foreign country so he can start a war. It ended up playing out like the Ghostbusters scene with the mayor and Walter Peck, and slayed me when the exchange ended on the PCs saying "Yes it's true, this knight has no d***"

XD

It was fun.
Zuche 28th Jan 2014, 6:36 AM edit delete reply
Participants in Lair Assault's Attack of the Tyrantclaw were less than thrilled with the connection I made for the "dinosaurs" the orcs were riding. Most just saw two ankylosaurs, two triceratops, and pterosaurs. I saw a pair of sturdy frames, a pair with horns, and a pair with wings.

The first time they badly injured one of the ankylosaurs, I had one of the orcs cry out, "Pinkie Pie! NOOO!"
Digo 28th Jan 2014, 10:30 AM edit delete reply
Hee hee, that's funny.
kriss1989 28th Jan 2014, 9:13 AM edit delete reply
kriss1989
In a D&D session I had the party engage in a riddles game with a Sphinx. Wanting to start off easy, I used the egg riddle from the Hobbit. Turns out none of them ever read the Hobbit and I stumped them. My freak out was pparently hilarious.
Siccarus 29th Jan 2014, 8:07 AM edit delete reply
And they call themselves Fantasy nerds? For shame.
Saligia 28th Jan 2014, 9:25 AM edit delete reply
Our group was in the middle of complex plan which involved (among other things) our rogue (the spymaster) disguised as someone else and it was crucial that her disguise remained uncompromised. The problem appeared when we realized that no PC but her knew what kind of role she chose (it was nth hour of playing; "details" like that tend to slip ;)). Because of her prestige class she was damn good at disguising and nobody (but her, ironically) had Sense Motive that was worth a damn. Virtually it was next to impossible for any PC to recognize her. What's even worse we were supposed to meet in quite crowded area.
GM: "Soooo... You have some kind of secret sign or something so they can recognize you, right?"
Disguised Ashamed Rogue *obviously she hadn't thought about it*: "Um..."
*beat*
*frown turns to smile; she rises her glasses* "Psst! It is I, Leclerc."
GM was laughing so hard he let it pass.
Night Sage 28th Jan 2014, 9:40 AM edit delete reply
I'm GMing a game, and one of my PCs was a princess who has been kicked out of her homeland. The NPC they were talking to knew of her Royal status. The NPC said something, which pissed off the princess, and she kicked him right in the groin. Just as the NPC was about say "Excuse me Princess," another PC chimed in and said "Yipiee-ky-yay Mother Fucker." So I never really got to say the line, but hey, reference to "Die Hard," and it was fitting. Made me laugh, and was actually fitting to the character who said that.
Raxon 28th Jan 2014, 10:49 AM edit delete reply
Raxon
Most terrible reference joke? How about a terrible reference joke by a poorly designed character? Gotta lay some backstory on ya.

I was young, and enamored with a certain pair of movies. I created a Rakshasa enchanter/artificer type with a terrible indian accent. Good natured character, even in combat, which, looking back, probably made him look like a psychopath. He had built an iron golem companion.

The cringe moment came when after a female bandit got around the iron golem, closed to melee range, and learned why slap fights with tiger people end badly. After combat, he turned to the critically wounded woman and said, "Bye bye, goofy woman. I enjoyed repeatedly throwing you to the ground."

In the weeks following, I learned that there was an actual person of indian descent at the table. He was pissed I said the lines wrong. He also happened to be a fan of goofy movies like that.

The character I based my rakshasa on, naturally, was Ben from Short Circuit 2, a roboticist/computer expert of indian descent.
Digo 28th Jan 2014, 11:28 AM edit delete reply
Whoops. :)
Gotta know your audience.
Raxon 28th Jan 2014, 6:02 PM edit delete reply
Raxon
To be fair, the one indian guy was angry because I misquoted. Everyone else was angry because they disliked the movie.
Digo 29th Jan 2014, 5:47 AM edit delete reply
I'd probably side with the misquote anger. Even bad movies can have a good quote, but misquoting... yeah, when I'm GM I can't give points for that. :)
Blues 28th Jan 2014, 11:03 AM edit delete reply
So in the Fantasy Asia game, we've been making a ton of references to Game of Thrones, as it was basically the inspiration for all the politicking crap that we tries to do (It went just about as well as Ned Stark's, except we didn't lose our heads). This has only been slightly bad because one guy in the group hasn't actually read the books or seen the show, and never wants to.

However, that's not the funniest thing. The funniest thing was when we were looking into ways to seal a demon, and we found the highest ranked priest at the temple in the imperial capital. We ask him, and he explains that each demonic incursion is different... then proceeds to tell us about a hero named Wang Chi, and how he fought against an evil sorcerer named Lo Pan, who had summoned three demons of Rain, Lightning, and Thunder. It was at this point that I, basically the party face, was reduced to a stuttering, giggling mass, because I did not expect Big Trouble in Little China to show up.
HappyMuffin 28th Jan 2014, 11:35 AM edit delete reply
This was before I joined the group but appreantly the resedint munchkin broke the universe with an unenchanted staffsling and a crit fail. And now no one is alowed to make or buy staffslings. Too bad because they're preaty decent.
Nonagon 28th Jan 2014, 11:44 AM edit delete reply
"The gaze of the moon's eye covers all in a silvery glow, passing through flesh and stone... but can it see why kids love the taste of Cinnamon Toast Crunch?"
Onyxjew 28th Jan 2014, 1:38 PM edit delete reply
Nonagon, you are a genius.
Rhino_Man 28th Jan 2014, 11:25 PM edit delete reply
Gonna point out the obvious "magic missile at the darkness" schtick which happens quite a lot.

I think my favourite had to be the time we got into an argument with a mercenary guild leader over the death of his brother who happened to be a human with a lizard man template leaving him with scaly skin, and all the usual lizardy appearances but a mostly human face.

We did in fact kill him earlier but only to stop him from killing us and turning in a bounty placed on our heads by the BBEG.

At which point, our dual wielding sharpshooter yells, "it's not my fault, he shot first" (which wasn't true because he was the one who killed the guy by sneak attacking him under the table with a hand crossbow)
super_big_mac 2nd Feb 2014, 2:10 AM edit delete reply
Now see, if I'd been GMing, I'd have had the Guild Leader's brother be named Hu, and set you up for the "Hu shot first" joke, a play on "Who's on First."

But that's because I love the classical classics. Though Star Wars comes fairly close.
Fishtie 29th Jan 2014, 4:14 PM edit delete reply
"There may be an army comming to burn this place down.

But someone's always playing kingdom games. Always changing kingdom names.

Don't you remember?

We built this city.

We built this city on rock and loam!"

<guitar>
Cobalt 29th Jan 2014, 4:47 PM edit delete reply
In a custom-setting DnD 3.5 game I play in, our DM (also a friend of mine) likes to slip in some nerdy references here and there, like finding a whip and fedora frozen in a ruin in Stygia, or a half-construct cultist's first words upon being reincarnated back into a human by our Shaman being "New teeth... that's weird".
Digo 28th Jan 2014, 6:07 AM edit delete reply
If only the comic title said "Monty" instead of Monthly. It would TOTALLY fit better. :D
Newbiespud 28th Jan 2014, 6:19 AM edit delete reply
Newbiespud
I thought suggesting the phrase would be a bit more clever than outright using it. I dunno.
Digo 28th Jan 2014, 7:04 AM edit delete reply
I guess I made my Will save versus Suggestion.
XScarredHeart 28th Jan 2014, 6:37 AM edit delete reply
I hope now you quote the three-headed knight from Holy Grail when the hydra shows up. XD
ANW 28th Jan 2014, 6:41 AM edit delete reply
It is time!
You guys have picked, the best of the best. Now, it is time to see, who is the best of them all.
Round 1:
She is the voice of reason of the 3.
Give it up for Sweetieee Belllle.
Mistress of the Night.
Luuuuunaaaaa.
Small and weak, but big and strong heart.
Fluuuuutershyyyy.
Who is the best of these 3 cuties?
Winner moves on.
Ref 28th Jan 2014, 6:48 AM edit delete reply
Sweetie Belle has to win this round.
Digo 28th Jan 2014, 7:03 AM edit delete reply
Between the three choices, I too would say Sweetie Belle is the best.
aylatrigger 28th Jan 2014, 7:44 AM edit delete reply
aylatrigger
Well, my brother would vote Fluttershy.

But in my opinion, it depends on your definition of 'best'. The most badass is of course, Fluttershy (unless counting Sweetie Bot). The most powerful is Luna. The cutest is up to personal (or ponyal) opinion, but I would go with Fluttershy. Sweetie Belle is a bard, Fluttershy a druid, and Luna is mostly made of Deity levels, so my favorite to play would either be Luna or Fluttershy (I can play bards so they are fun, I'm not hating on them; I just prefer druids). In real life, I would be closest to Sweetie Belle.

If just best in general, I guess I will go with Fluttershy, but it's a tough decision.
Night Sage 28th Jan 2014, 9:32 AM edit delete reply
Princess Luna all the way.
Euric 28th Jan 2014, 10:01 AM edit delete reply
Sweetie belle all the way.

I never really thought of her as a bard tho. It makes sense.

Do it, fanfic writers! We're all waiting now!
Blues 28th Jan 2014, 11:05 AM edit delete reply
Luuuuuunaaaaaaaaaa
Moonstone 28th Jan 2014, 11:10 AM edit delete reply
Luna is best princess.
She's probably better at tabletop games than Sweetie and Fluttershy combined.
Tatsurou 28th Jan 2014, 12:05 PM edit delete reply
Tatsurou
Urg...my three favorites! How do I choose?
...Luna. First favorite is best favorite.
sjosten 28th Jan 2014, 12:26 PM edit delete reply
Sweetie Belle of course.
Zebasiz 28th Jan 2014, 12:45 PM edit delete reply
Fluttershy~!~!~!
Anyone who says otherwise is being controlled by Sweetie-bard's enchanting songs and Luna's godly mind-control powers!
T_T 28th Jan 2014, 7:37 PM edit delete reply
T_T
Luna for the win!!!
anyone who thinks otherwise are either dolls made by Fluttershy, or people (ponies) being hypnotized by Sweetie-bard's song!!!
banjo2E 28th Jan 2014, 7:45 PM edit delete reply
banjo2E
Seaty Belt all the way.
Blank 29th Jan 2014, 1:43 AM edit delete reply
Sweetie Belle is best pony... soooooo yea, i vote for her =D
XanatosDrake 29th Jan 2014, 12:39 PM edit delete reply
luna is the most adorable.
Thar 29th Jan 2014, 1:34 PM edit delete reply
Luna all the way.
Disloyal Subject 30th Jan 2014, 9:43 PM edit delete reply
Luna. I like geeky gals, and she fits the bill. I also like ham amd cheese; she pulls that off to. And on top of dark, graceful beauty, she can toss around world-breaking deific power; lightning strikes are but PUNCTUAION to her!
And yet... how could Fluttershy not advance? When the chips are down, she always pulls through if it's important. ...Oh.
GreyDuck 28th Jan 2014, 7:15 AM edit delete reply
Applejack makes a perfectly acceptable stand-in for Graham Chapman in this riff. Well played, well played.
Salen 28th Jan 2014, 7:22 AM edit delete reply
And now for something COMPLETELY different...
kriss1989 28th Jan 2014, 9:10 AM edit delete reply
kriss1989
The Funniest thing you've ever seen....from really far away!
*muttermuttermutter* BOOOOMM! Apples!
Jason Shadow 28th Jan 2014, 7:47 PM edit delete reply
Jason Shadow
I'm crushing your head... I'm crushing your head! Crush! Crush!
Digo 29th Jan 2014, 5:49 AM edit delete reply
A pink earth pony, with three plot points.
Anon 28th Jan 2014, 8:39 AM edit delete reply
There is a time and a place for the classics. Using them outside these can be.... risky. I almost risked my job by forgetting this.

I used to work at a call center; for obvious reasons, if someone called in they would have to provide information to prove who they said they were. An older gentleman I was speaking to failed the most common method of ID, so I rummaged around for secondary info until he proved himself. After all this was done came the immortal setup line: "I just wanted my balance, I wasn't expecting the Spanish Inquisition."

It took EVERYTHING I had, every scrap of willpower, to the point of physical pain, not to give the traditional reply. As much as I wanted to, I knew our bosses had no discernable sense of humor and I needed the job. The rest of the call went without incident; afterwards, I took a brief break to collect myself, and mentioned it to a friend of mine across the cube. Without even skipping a beat, he jumped in with what I couldn't say; the expression on our manager's face was priceless.
redwings1340 28th Jan 2014, 8:52 AM edit delete reply
redwings1340
Ugh, I know everything is scripted in these customer service jobs (not your fault, just is), but I can't believe there is a customer in the world who would have complained if they give you that perfect setup...
Digo 28th Jan 2014, 10:32 AM edit delete reply
I would have soooo been fired if it were me.
Raxon 28th Jan 2014, 11:34 AM edit delete reply
Raxon
I would have given a five minute lecture on the rise and fall of the spanish inquisition, and the politics, and loosely connected it to what I was selling, via painfully flawed similes and metaphors.

But then, I am chaotic neutral, so that's still in character for me.
Zeeth 28th Jan 2014, 5:59 PM edit delete reply
"*sigh* I'm sorry, sir. No one expects that. But it had to be done, and now we can move on to the cake!"
Euric 28th Jan 2014, 10:03 AM edit delete reply
Woohoo! New episode of friendship is dragons! There goes two hours of my day
Doctor Sweet 28th Jan 2014, 10:48 AM edit delete reply
Any predictions for next arc? I hope/think it'll be Secret of my Excess.
Moonstone 28th Jan 2014, 11:09 AM edit delete reply
My group tends to be a bit reference heavy, but one of the worst I've ever seen was from my first campaign. One of the others, a regular with our DM, decided we needed to distract a certain NPC. Despite repeatedly attempting to play the party slut despite being a wizard with 12 Cha, the player actually didn't go for the sex-appeal route.
Instead, in the middle of a crowded gambling hall, we were all treated to several minutes of "HEY! LISTEN! HEY! HEY! LISTEN! LISTEN! HEY!"
The funny part is, the wizard didn't plan on what to do once we had the NPC's attention.
Disloyal Subject 30th Jan 2014, 9:47 PM edit delete reply
I do that too: get the baddie's attention and then fumble it. I'll not again forget that rogues have Uncanny Dodge when weighing the merits of facepunching as a conversation ender.
Adser 28th Jan 2014, 12:18 PM edit delete reply
I have the feeling the GM will scream "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH MY CAMPAIGN" after s/he learns about all of Pinkie Pie "additions"
Codeman 28th Jan 2014, 9:37 PM edit delete reply
I thought pinkie was supposed to get this screened by the DM anyway?
Adser 28th Jan 2014, 9:59 PM edit delete reply
Well yeah, the "draft" of the campaign was screened by the GM, but the chances that Pinkie Pie will stick to that draft are 0, I´m pretty sure it has already gone off-rails.
Great Dinn 28th Jan 2014, 12:26 PM edit delete reply
Great Dinn
As noted by the wonderful Mr. Newbiespud, the tumblr is up and running at fidpodcast.tumblr.com, and there is currently an ask box open for suggestions on what you, THE VIEWER, would like to see. Please let me know what sort of thing you want out of this tumblr-y experience.
FanOfMostEverything 28th Jan 2014, 1:18 PM edit delete reply
I get the distinct sense that Pinkie's player would've stood outside the room all night, waiting for her cue.

Or she'd get bored within five minutes and come back in with a soda, having forgotten about the aborted reference. Either or.
redwings1340 28th Jan 2014, 1:22 PM edit delete reply
redwings1340
Wherever she is, Rarity's player just felt an unnatural chill in the air.
you know that guy 28th Jan 2014, 5:37 PM edit delete reply
Didn't anypony post the source yet?

http://youtube.com/watch?v=0MY_BKuCzrU
Codeman 28th Jan 2014, 9:32 PM edit delete reply
I really need to watch this movie. It seems to great not to watch.
Sorakirin 29th Jan 2014, 6:29 PM edit delete reply
Our mage hadn't decided on a name. I wound up opening my big mouth and said "There are those who call him Tim". The name stuck.
Curb 29th Jan 2014, 7:03 PM edit delete reply
Nice Sorakirin...

As for my groups, we where doing a Palladium Fantasy adventure in the hill country when the party announced they wanted to set up camp, and suddenly got worried at my smile.
"as you round the bend, you see a campfire with several locals around it, one approaches you..."
Everyone cringed, they knew where this was going...
"Greetings, I am Lothar of the Hill People, come and sit by the fire..."
I had watched enough SNL to know the scene and went with it, was hillarious, voice inflections and all! Little did they know, they would run into Lothar and the fearsome She-Beast of the Clay Courts several times in the campaign.
Broken Logic 30th Jan 2014, 2:16 AM edit delete reply
Whenever bars come up in an rp, I can't help but say:
"Roll to see if I get drunk."

Oh, and time to pimp a relevant pic I drew ages ago.
http://r4nd0m745k.deviantart.com/art/NoponyExpects-NATGIID15-321633136
Disloyal Subject 30th Jan 2014, 9:55 PM edit delete reply
I've never been in or DM'd a group without someone doing that at every bar; they tend to fail the Fort saves vs alcohol (houseruled DC 12, initial 1d4-1 DEX, secondary 1d4-1 CHA). Someone usually checks out the barmaid(s), too - on which note, a half-orc hooker is probably the most unusual NPC-to-PC conversion I've seen. She made a great rogue (with a sprinkle of a Barbarian variant from Unearthed Arcana.)
Svartwulf 30th Jan 2014, 8:34 AM edit delete reply
I was dming a campaign which featured a half-fae reporter and a tiny twin tailed fox ninja. The reporter broke bother her weapons on a crit fail and in a moment of panic unleashed the phrase that has lived in hilarity since before launching her tiny weaponized teammate through the air.

"Tails, I choose you!!!!!"
Falchus 30th Jan 2014, 1:13 PM edit delete reply
I just burst out laughing in the middle of Kings Cross.

Thanks a lot Newbie, now I look weird.
Fancy Fan 1st Feb 2014, 3:47 PM edit delete reply
We were in a dwarven mine slaying zombies. We all broke out singing "Hi-ho hi-ho. Its of to slay we go!"
JayY 19th Jul 2014, 12:23 PM edit delete reply
I can hear Pinkie Pie saying the line. I can actually her voice!
Hazey Logic 11th Sep 2014, 6:57 AM edit delete reply
*congratulatory hoof bump*
albedoequals1 13th Feb 2015, 1:46 PM edit delete reply
albedoequals1
YES