Page 258 - The Tribble I've Seen

14th Mar 2013, 6:00 AM
The Tribble I've Seen
Average Rating: 4.83 (6 votes)
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Author Notes:

Newbiespud 14th Mar 2013, 6:00 AM edit delete
Newbiespud
Well, neither the gizka nor rabbits reproduce asexually, but whatever gets the point across!

98 Comments:

Raxon 14th Mar 2013, 6:01 AM edit delete reply
Raxon
They'll try, if they get desperate enough.

Huh. There's an idea for a historical fanfic. Think gay british cowboy rabbits in Australia. brokeback hellhole, I think I'll call it.
Cain 14th Mar 2013, 1:09 PM edit delete reply
Cain
if you ever needed a reason to drink, that image is it...
PrincessCadence 14th Mar 2013, 4:52 PM edit delete reply
Brokeback-ship Down
Kaze Koichi 15th Mar 2013, 3:39 AM edit delete reply
I have a great urge to break you back for this comment.
Zuche 15th Mar 2013, 7:26 AM edit delete reply
It only works if you show them eating pudding.
darkwulf23 14th Mar 2013, 6:01 AM edit delete reply
darkwulf23
It is now the next post Pat. You are now officially un-shunned.
Pat 14th Mar 2013, 6:07 AM edit delete reply
I'm sorry.
darkwulf23 14th Mar 2013, 6:09 AM edit delete reply
darkwulf23
Naw it's all good. Personally I didn't care, I just like being a wise ass on here.
Raxon 14th Mar 2013, 6:08 AM edit delete reply
Raxon
No. No he is not. He will not be un-shunned until he actually contributes with his posts. Unlike me. after all, you all know I contribute loads of relevant and pertinent stuff. Like gay british cowboy rabbits in Australia.

Sooo relevant.
Newbiespud 14th Mar 2013, 6:15 AM edit delete reply
Newbiespud
It wouldn't be such a big deal, but in my experience, the first comment tends to set the tone for most of the discussion on a given page. Because the comments are ordered first to last, the first comment is the first thing people read after the comic.

...And today, we once again start off with Raxon being Raxon. *sigh*
Destrustor 14th Mar 2013, 6:20 AM edit delete reply
Destrustor
Is there any other way to start?
Digo 14th Mar 2013, 8:00 AM edit delete reply
I can think of a long (and quite family friendly) list of things... ;)
Destrustor 14th Mar 2013, 11:02 AM edit delete reply
Destrustor
Yeah but the best part of waking up is Raxon in your comments!
Digo 14th Mar 2013, 11:53 AM edit delete reply
This is true and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Just saying that the territory of non-Raxon commentary is quite extensive. And clean. ;)
But yeah, that's boring.
Raxon 14th Mar 2013, 6:21 AM edit delete reply
Raxon
You know, I used to be just a normal commenter like almost anyone else. Then I got my iconic mug on here. And you wouldn't have it any other way.

I may be that one guy among your readers, but there's always that one guy. Aren't you glad that I'm at least manageable? And funny? Can you imagine if I was that kind of guy to shoehorn my political views into every comment, rather than my silliness, and my secure grasp of rule 34?

Besides, I had to make sure it didn't start with a "first" comment again.

So very, very relevant.
Newbiespud 14th Mar 2013, 6:27 AM edit delete reply
Newbiespud
I suppose not, Destrustor.

Don't get me wrong, Raxon. It's not that I don't like you. It's just that I'm so very, very NOT you.

But I do read all of your comments, Raxon. You wield your crazy with unusual skill and authority. And you do a service here, providing the crazy to this internet comment section that I might otherwise not. So, as different as we are, you and I, I've always respected you since you became a regular.

Even if I have to sigh at what you write sometimes. But that's kind of the point, isn't it?
Raxon 14th Mar 2013, 6:34 AM edit delete reply
Raxon
It's not the size off the crazy, it's how you use it. And I use it like a master swordsman, swinging my crazy and causing only minimal cognitive dysfunction in my victims.

But don't feel too bad. It happens to lots of guys. They make these nice little blue pills to fix that. Well, they were blue. Mine are orange now. I don't particularly like them, but it sure beats going back to the kind I have to swallow.
Kiranis 16th Mar 2013, 9:56 AM edit delete reply
HELP ME! Raxon is getting predicable!

if your wondering I knew he would make a Viagra joke after reading swinging my crazy around.

HELPPPPPPPPPPP!
Catz 15th Mar 2013, 4:05 AM edit delete reply
Wait... Raxon isn't a co-author or moderator!? I assumed that was how he always got first comment, and that you liked the idea of a Deadpool-like guy starting discussions on a silly note?
CJT 14th Mar 2013, 9:55 AM edit delete reply
That... could be the most bizzare re-imaginging of Watership Down ever.

And for some reason I'm now picturing it as an anime.

I probably shouldn't read Raxon's posts while sleep-deprived.
Sjosten 14th Mar 2013, 1:04 PM edit delete reply
Oddly, I've found they make more sense when I haven't slept lately. Crazy is as crazy does I suppose.
Cain 14th Mar 2013, 1:10 PM edit delete reply
Cain
yes the crazy commentator squad is more of a bunch of misfits than anything else.
Destrustor 14th Mar 2013, 1:46 PM edit delete reply
Destrustor
Wait, there's a squad?
Where do I sign up?
And who is in it besides Raxon and the awesome yet mysterious individual known as DefinitelyNotRaxon?
Cain 14th Mar 2013, 4:07 PM edit delete reply
Cain
you never know...
kriss1989 16th Mar 2013, 3:24 AM edit delete reply
kriss1989
Well whoever it is it's definitely not Raxxon...wait a minute...it's Miss Moneypenny isn't it!
DracoS 14th Mar 2013, 6:18 AM edit delete reply
Ha ha ha...gizka. I can just imagine the crew arguing over who had to clean those things up after you gave them the poison.
KoshLovesYou 16th Mar 2013, 11:11 AM edit delete reply
And a bonus of embarrassed Star Wars/MMO fan Rainbow Dash Player detected!
NESgamer190 14th Mar 2013, 6:19 AM edit delete reply
What could possibly go wrong with the adorable stress balls? They're so cute and huggable and spontaneously become more numerous.

Poor Fluttershy player though. Even in here, I relate often to her, often asking what do I roll, and not knowing much in terms of street smarts.

I wonder if anyone else had that kind of moment, where they had no clue at all what to do or what is going on.
RileaSW 14th Mar 2013, 6:46 AM edit delete reply
That's every single game session for me recently. My character is STRICTLY a wilderness archetype, a hunter/guide to be precise.

Now, there are a few things she can do in other situations, but not many. And the fact we've been in nothing but Social and Civilization encounters recently means I'm sitting there trying to figure out how I can contribute to the party. So far I have two skills that are useful: I can watch out for danger and I can remember where the heck we parked our starship. :P
Flashpoint 14th Mar 2013, 6:47 AM edit delete reply
Flashpoint
I've seen it a lot, since we have multiple DMs, and all but one get frustrated at new people who don't already know what they're doing. The DM portrayed in this is probably one of the nicest to new players I've ever seen.
Mudpony 14th Mar 2013, 9:40 AM edit delete reply
I tend to like players that are new to the system myself, because there's a certain purity to their actions. The better you know the system, the more likely meta-gaming will influence your decisions.

Of course, that assumes that lack of knowledge doesn't slow the game down too much.
NaughtSought 22nd Mar 2013, 8:33 PM edit delete reply
But what happens when you have those people who have never played yet read things like this? How does there meta-gaming without having played affect their actions? Are they now impure like Raxon's mind?
Giggle Tail 14th Mar 2013, 12:55 PM edit delete reply
Giggle Tail
I'm definitely the Fluttershy of my D&D group, as well as my circle of friends in general. I don't get a lot of their references (mostly because I'm more childlike than the rest of them), I'm shy and often afraid to stand up for myself, I have comparatively low self esteem, and I'm often not sure what I'm doing.
Guest 14th Mar 2013, 8:01 AM edit delete reply
I think that is pretty much every player ever. We all were beginners at some point so we had to start somewhere. (Unless your like Twilight Sparkle and study the entire rule book before you play)
Digo 14th Mar 2013, 8:05 AM edit delete reply
"What could possibly go wrong with the adorable stress balls?"

Hmmm, cute Throwable props that in large quantities can turn a session into Dodgeball from Hell? :D
CJT 14th Mar 2013, 9:59 AM edit delete reply
If the DM plans to make props for these in bulk, he'll probably switch to ping-pong balls and sharpie drawings past the first few.

And after the first few _dozen_, he'll forgo the sharpies and buy a bag of foam packing peanuts to use as proxies.

At which point, he'll discover exactly how epic a mess an open bag of packing peanuts is (they collect static charge, and stick to _everything_).
Digo 14th Mar 2013, 11:54 AM edit delete reply
I found that the easiest way to clean up packing peanuts off something is to drag a long strip of seran wrap over it.
Aegis Steadfast 14th Mar 2013, 11:25 PM edit delete reply
Aegis Steadfast
In short, yes. Every day of my life.
Anarion 14th Mar 2013, 6:44 AM edit delete reply
So, a thought. Today's comic does a pretty good job of showing common cultural references we all think we have. Has Fluttershy's situation happened to anypony else?

Mine was Redwall. I have never read those books and the entire rest of my gaming group had. When we got shrunken and they started making jokes about being mice, I had no idea what they were talking about.
Kynrasian 14th Mar 2013, 7:18 AM edit delete reply
Kynrasian
For me that basically involves never making film references in front of me. I won't get it.

I sort of served as a lesson for my friends in that regard: that no matter how popular a film is, it doesn't mean that everyone's seen it.

It's funny, I actually can relate to Rainbow Dash more in this panel. I'm no power gamer, but if I've seen something before someplace else, it's more than likely from a game.
Digo 14th Mar 2013, 8:08 AM edit delete reply
I'm the only player in my group that regularly watches My Little Pony FiM. So any friendship references I use will be pretty much wasted.

The other dissonance of note is that while everyone in the group reads online comics, we rarely overlap on which comics we read. Therefore any online comic reference will only be understood by half the group.
InvisibleDale 14th Mar 2013, 8:30 AM edit delete reply
Back in the olden days (circa 90's), I played with a group that had all read the Belgariad series. I hadn't. Inside jokes everywhere and I didn't get any of the references. Finally read the books. Waste of my time, imo.
Guest 14th Mar 2013, 1:08 PM edit delete reply
I actually DMed for a group that attributed something I had an NPC do as a reference to one of the Indiana Jones films despite the fact that I never watched any of them.
Sjosten 14th Mar 2013, 1:07 PM edit delete reply
I have the gift of mostly playing with my brothers and my very close friends, so we all know pretty much the same stuff.
Cain 14th Mar 2013, 1:13 PM edit delete reply
Cain
the people I play with have mostly similar reference pools. Though some jokes fly over the heads of some of the players. I once DMd and had Emporio Ivankov from One Piece show up and then vanish. Very few got it, and one who arrived late just head the description from one who didn't and commented, 'I missed a One Piece gag? Damn it.'
Cain 14th Mar 2013, 7:01 PM edit delete reply
Cain
and just had a joke to make a reference to Rommel when fighting foxes in a desert... Only one got it.
Edit: and a Blues Brother reference goes over the heads of half the group
*Sigh* 14th Mar 2013, 8:24 PM edit delete reply
You made an Ivankov gag character? You magnificent bastard.
ANW 14th Mar 2013, 7:07 AM edit delete reply
Poll Time:
If Twilight did not do what she did, would there be a way to keep those cute(yes, I admit they're cute) little fuzzballs as pets, and not eat Ponyville out of house and home.
Me, no. Twilight's mistake made it seemed alot more obverisce(sp).
bonus points for explaning how.
Raxon 14th Mar 2013, 7:13 AM edit delete reply
Raxon
Of course there is! You just keep them in cages and only feed them once a month, and let any offspring starve to death.
Kynrasian 14th Mar 2013, 7:28 AM edit delete reply
Kynrasian
There's a fine line between being a pet and being a captive.

Actually several lines, made of strong metal, vertically oriented. Usually closed at the top, bottom as well if necessary. Crossing them is usually very difficult.
Destrustor 14th Mar 2013, 7:28 AM edit delete reply
Destrustor
And then feed them their own dead offspring.

Recycling: Everypony can do it!
Sus 14th Mar 2013, 7:32 AM edit delete reply
Sus
As a Dwarf Fortress player, I certainly approve. Although you could also turn the offspring into +parasprite tallow roast+s... or maybe make them have pit fights for fun and profit?

The real question is, WHERE has Fluttershy's player been living? I mean, is it really possible to not have seen neither Tribbles, Gremlins nor KotOR? o_0

Also, that fanfic needs to happen.
grtgfbll 14th Mar 2013, 7:50 AM edit delete reply
grtgfbll
Yes on the Tribbles. The only reason I even know of them is references like this one... and I know nothing of KotOR.
BornEquestrian 14th Mar 2013, 7:59 AM edit delete reply
Personally, I didn't know about Tribbles until they were talked about in comments when watching Swarm of the century. I have never played KotOR. I have never really been that interested in Sci-Fi. It was such a long time ago since I seen a clip from Gremlins I remember nothing of it. All I know now is that it they apparently reproduce quickly due to that being implied in the comic. I was born and raised in Canada where such knowledge is readably available. For me it is a believable situation to be in no matter where you are, since I am in it just like Fluttershy's player.

Edit: actually I am in probably worse condition than Fluttershy since I didn't know the rabbits in Australia problem that Fluttershy related to
CJT 14th Mar 2013, 10:06 AM edit delete reply
Capsule summary of the rabbit problem:

Colonists brought over rabbits to breed in captivity for food and pelts.

One guy missed hunting in England, so released about two dozen rabbits to start a game population.

A decade later there were a couple hundred million. Literally. Rabbits have no natural predators in Australia. They _are_ almost as big an ecological disaster there as Tribbles would be.
ANW 14th Mar 2013, 8:47 AM edit delete reply
Looks likes I live where Fluttershy's player lives, cause I never heard of Tribbles, Gremlins, or KotOR.
ANW 14th Mar 2013, 8:48 AM edit delete reply
Looks likes I live where Fluttershy's player lives, cause I never heard of Tribbles, Gremlins, or KotOR.
CJT 14th Mar 2013, 10:04 AM edit delete reply
Anyone much younger than their 30s won't have seen reruns of TOS. Heck, I have co-workers younger than many of the 80s movies I enjoyed. There are also a disturbing number of people whose formative Trek experiences were with Voyager.

XKCD had a comic with a comprehensive list of touchstones-by-date. It made me feel old :).

Regarding exposure to movies and games, it's important to remember that there are people who don't enjoy watching movies (or at least most popular genres of movie), and there are people who don't play video games (or various popular genres of video games). Fluttershy's player could certainly be one of these. Arguably _I'm_ one of these, as most movies don't pass my "can be bothered to spend the time" threshold, and most of my gaming is either retrogaming or Minecraft.

So, it can happen, more often than you'd think.
Flashpoint 14th Mar 2013, 12:12 PM edit delete reply
Flashpoint
I never knew what any of the things they were talking about in this comic were until today because I decided to look them up out of curiosity. I'm not much of a sci-fi person.
ANW 6th Mar 2015, 5:41 AM edit delete reply
Yes.
evilauthor 14th Mar 2013, 7:53 AM edit delete reply
You're assuming the offspring won't get so hungry that they'll eat the CAGE.
Digo 14th Mar 2013, 8:10 AM edit delete reply
At that point I think I would declare it a lost cause and fish out a flamethrower.
Twilight 14th Mar 2013, 11:27 AM edit delete reply
Actually, very easily, and with a spell that inflicts what is probably the most commonly overlooked status ailment ever.
Slow.
SLow down their metabolism and inherent reproduction rate to manageable levels, and they become completely harmless. If they only need to eat once a month, and breed less than that, you're fine.
Walabio 15th Mar 2013, 4:52 PM edit delete reply
Yes

I would save up 99.99 U$D for having it sterilized. Then, I could have a pet ParaSprite.
Jadelynn 14th Mar 2013, 7:51 AM edit delete reply
Jadelynn
Alright, I'm gonna call bullshit on this one. I personally haven't seen Trouble with Tribbles, Gremlins, nor have I played KotOR. But I still knew about the concept of tribbles through sheer pop culture osmosis. What, has she been living under a rock her entire life?
Guest 14th Mar 2013, 8:04 AM edit delete reply
No, a cottage near the forest.
BornEquestrian 14th Mar 2013, 8:08 AM edit delete reply
I didn't know about Tribbles until they were mentioned in comments on Swarm of the Century, if I had never saw that episode and read those comments I would not know about it. If someone has mentioned Tribbles before then I would not know what they were talking about. Heck I forgot about them again until they were mentioned in the comments of Tuesday's comic. This comic and the episode that it is based on was my way of learning it through pop culture osmosis, just as it is for Fluttershy's character.
Digo 14th Mar 2013, 8:12 AM edit delete reply
It is possible!

We had a player in our group once who knew *Nothing* about Star Wars pop culture. Unbelieveable, true, but possible. In her case it was because her father believed sci-fi was only for boys so she was barred as a child from anything Star Wars.

Of course my group fixed that when she joined up and lived away from home since. :)
Zuche 14th Mar 2013, 9:20 AM edit delete reply
Someone always slips through the cracks of pop culture. Certain value systems can make it easier to remain firmly in that place: No matter how many times a specific reference is heard, it simply doesn't find a place to stick and goes unnoticed.
Malchior 14th Mar 2013, 8:58 AM edit delete reply
Today's Story Time: Tell how you or your party accomplished something considered impossible or nigh-impossible. Stories from Exalted don't count. If you don't break the impossible in that game, you're doing it wrong.
vonschweetzracing 14th Mar 2013, 9:59 AM edit delete reply
So, my group was playing an Air Gear campaign, and our little group was gaining quite a bit of notoriety for being the most honorable of the teams, and the DM wrote up an encounter meant specifically to drop us from the high we were riding. It was meant to be impossible. But, through luck and some really good improvisation that I can't really remember right now, we beat the match, leaving the DM stunned, but proud.
FanOfMostEverything 14th Mar 2013, 10:03 AM edit delete reply
Well, there was that one time the heroic mortal character with obscene wealth and two firewands set the starting town on fire, causing so much chaos and destruction that I had to reset the game. I blamed it on the Loom of Fate getting a BSoD.
A shame that game never went anywhere. I was going to make a fire elemental with the portfolio of fires that one guy started. It probably would've become a dragon within a year.
Philadelphus 14th Mar 2013, 10:24 AM edit delete reply
Philadelphus
Well, there was the time I and several other people were playing our very first game of Pony Tales (my very first role-playing game, period). We'd just escaped an attack on Marelantis by the Big Bad's army and found the first of the three MacGuffins we needed...only to discover that the Big Bad had beaten us to it. (Previously when we had fought him, he'd been completely unaffected by all the damage we did to him, then knocked us all out and left us, so we were a bit worried.)

Except this time, he brought along reinforcements, in the form of an Ancient One of the ocean, as near as we could tell. Giant, tentacled monstrosity, you get the picture.

So one of our players, who was playing the only mare in the group, walks up to it and basically puppy-dog-eyes it into being friendly while the rest of us pour Magic Points and whatever else assistance we can into his roll. I think the final roll result was over 80, if I remember correctly. The creature decided not to attack us, its first friends, and the Big Bad teleported away while face-hoofing.

Of course, there was also the time after that when one of our players used the power of Laughter to summon that same creature RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF APPLELOOSA, which caused the total destruction of the town. In a last ditch panic effort, he then used magic (again aided by the group, and that first MacGuffin which amplified magic effects) to turn the giant monster into a baby foal. Which the player's character who had first befriended it immediately adopted. I think with the Pearl amplifying it, out final roll result was over 200 on that one.
TheStratovarian 14th Mar 2013, 11:36 AM edit delete reply
It wasn't exactly a direct nigh impossible, just a very literal spanner in the design works.

Our group, was doing the dreaded 3.5 revision of acererak's tomb, the TPK place of death and dismemberment, instant deathtraps, fates worse than death, and super cute kitties that steal your soul. You know, the usual frat party movie gone really wrong, or really right, depending where you end up in production. We had a mix of ecl 14's(effective character level) types. A full monster high angel, our main meat shield. Our succubi paladin (and angels significant other) A lizard woman priestess (Of hextor, though she did get along with the angel after the necromantic incident.) Our rogue was human, and another human thayan wizard. (super specialist evoker)

The game we learned really quick, for this module, is that absolutely none of the deathtraps were arranged around a demon adventurer. The instant poison kill ones, immune with the demon, the super crusher that would stop anyone, ineffective. The charm from the harpy, stopped by magic resistance. by the end of the first area, the dm, had to houserule in behind the scenes nearly four different additions to the module, just for the first part. And he couldnt even kill her either, because of how the 3.5 ring of regen she had. (As a 2nd edition player, those things broke the game, they still do to a lesser extent in 3.5) He couldn't use acid or fire to destroy the body (to prevent the ring from working) Even the succubi fight was a riot of re-charming the heroes the other succubi's charmed. The demi-lich construct, grabbed, and pulled into the wall, then released stuck there.

Then we got to moil, part 2. And she yet again broke the game with her special abilities. The big danger to moil, is the threat of a fall, into the undead plane, and the power undead had in this necropolistic limbo. There are three special things you have to do to break into the final area, and its timed, with a very nasty boss that you have to out fox to win. While the game expects that a player might fly via magic, they didn't count the speed of natural fliers. Since the dm couldn't house rule the same crud for open space, he was rather powerless to have her actually bypass the traps for triggering the specials and her angelic interest out fly the dream eater. It was a blast to watch the dm ready to pull his hair out in trying to find any reason to find a reason to even with magic be fair, yet not try to force the encounters as they were meant to be done.

We never did get to do the third part, as the mage had left the group there due to life reasons. But the angel would have just been a riot there for so many reasons.

It was just, amazing to see one of the very dreaded modules of d&d turned to a wet noodle by an odd oversight.
Tatsurou 14th Mar 2013, 11:44 AM edit delete reply
Something considered impossible? Well, here goes.
I was once in a Final Fantasy campaign. The character I created was a six year old girl with the Monster Tamer class.
Her backstory involved watching helplessly at the tender age of four as her parents were slaughtered by bandits, only to be rescued by the bandits own hunt-hound, who was still with her to that day. The hunt-hound would scavange and bring her food and other items to help her survive.
After reading through all of this, the DM and I worked out what made sense for her stats and feats. By the time we were finished, nearly all of her stats were abysmal (she was only 6), except for one.
After bonuses and feats, her Charisma bonus to rolls was 34.
I literally coasted through that game with 'The Dreaded Puppy Dog Eyes'. With that bonus, even rolling a one led to a monster at least hesitating before attacking her, and anything else led to a monster either choosing not to attack her or befriending her. The only exception to this was anything humanoid, which she was instinctivly distrustful of due to her past.

The DM got frustrated with this at one point, and sent the original bandit group that killed her parents after our party.
Due to bad rolls, the first thing that happened was the death of the 'traitorous' hunt-hound.
(That seriously pissed off the rest of the party, btw. Even thought the hound didn't have a name, I did really good dog behavior impressions and they loved that little doggy. Seriously, the party cleric actually said, "Give me cover, I'm casting ressurect" the moment the dog died.)
Then the bandit group assaulted in main force. With our cleric distracted by already engaging the ressurect ritual, we were slowly getting wasted. It looked like it was going to be a TPK...
Then the little girl called out for help.
The DM told me to roll to see if anyone answered. This discussion followed.

Warrior: WHy would she be calling for anyone? She doesn't trust humans.
DM: Well, I was going to give you a chance of Charisma help, but if you'd rather she roll nature...(Nature bonus only totalled 8. She lacked experience, after all.)
Rogue: Doesn't being a Monster Tamer mean she can apply Charisma to Nature rolls?
DM: ... ...(looks something up) Yes... But given your location, you'd have to roll pretty darn well to-
Me: *roll* nat 20.
DM: ... ... You're kidding me.

After checking some tables he created... a red dragon answered my call for help and wasted the bandits.It then settled down next to the little girl for ear scratches.
Digo 14th Mar 2013, 12:08 PM edit delete reply
That nat 20 was just perfect icing!
Digo 14th Mar 2013, 12:07 PM edit delete reply
Shadowrun 4e-- The team consisted of:
Fox (a face)
Stealth (melee expert)
Lupina (shaman spellcaster)

Situation was this: We hunted down a toxic shaman (we nicked named him Toxi) to a cabin the snowy hills of Oregon. Toxi was held up in the cabin with two civilian hostages and we would rather not get those killed.
Party argued over how to proceed.

Lupina grabs a shotgun (not proficient in this weapon) and hides it in her parka. She walks to the front door and knocks. Toxi asks who's there and Lupina explains that she's a ski-biker that's lost and out of gas two hills over. Please help me?

Toxi is a bit confident and thinks this will make a lovely 3rd prisoner. He answers the door ready to shoot a paralyzing spell at Lupina.

Lupina rolls a fast draw on the shotgun (default check, but passes!), aims at Toxi's face, and fires. Lupina declares she is using Edge, which is a limited-use bonus pool of dice that represents a hero's luck factor in any action. Edge also makes dice "explosive", meaning that if you roll the max value on any die, you reroll it to score more hits.

Edge Bonus + Penalty for default + Penalty for called shot (face) = 1 die to roll.

Her roll: 6, 6, 6, 5
Toxi fails to get even one net hit on a defense check.

Toxi eats a shotgun Slug to the face and we toast that the world is down one evil shaman.
Sjosten 14th Mar 2013, 1:12 PM edit delete reply
We were tracking this one elementalist (he was an idiot in retrospect) and found his camp. Around the time he started casting spells, we mobbed the poor guy. The GM, thinking he was a squishy, had no plans at all for what would happen if we didn't kill him. My brother critical hits a sucker punch and KO's the guy in one round. Took the GM months to figure out how that would affect the campaign.
Belze 14th Mar 2013, 2:43 PM edit delete reply
Well my favorite of all time is when i won a tournament in which i died.
Rule System was rolemaster so kills tend to depend on one lucky roll.
me being a a Warrior Monk i of course had to join a tournament in the first time we arrived in and bet all my gold on myself, first round a dwarf with a spear.
Being a monk i had no problems avoiding all attacks and would keep hitting him, but since all my crit rolls was <20 (d100) i just couldn't kill him and then came disaster and the dwarf hit me barely made a crit and rolled 100.
Instant death, my friend the archer got mad and made a head shot on the dwarf killing him. My group then went to a healer and got me revived.
The next day i went back to the tournament and demanded my winnings, since i was alive and the dwarf was dead i most have won the round, not being able to deny my logic i was allowed to continue the tournament (mainly because my next opponent was a ogre 3 times my size).
The ogre looked at me laughing "Ok kid you get the first attack"
So i kicked him in the kneecap making him fall to his knees and broke his neck.
Rest of the tournament went normally and I ended up winning and a lot of the rest of the game was about me boasting about how awesome I was, with my group trying to get me to lose each time a commoner challenged me. (which just let to more awesome stories)
Ambad 15th Mar 2013, 2:37 AM edit delete reply
This is also a Shadowrun 4e story, a long one, but a good one. The party was as follows:

Misha - Ork Mercenary/Bounty Hunter (my character)
Olaf - Dwarf Rigger/Hacker
Tim - Dwarf Face/Seduction Artist
Sam - Elf Bear Shaman/Stun Ball
Krusk - Troll Street Brawler/Rapetrain

Short Background/Recap: Our GM was heavily influenced by anime, specifically Evangellion, and so many of the NPCs we encountered were inspired by it. The BBEG was Gendo Ikari in name, appearance, and demeanor (though with a different background and no giant mecha connections), and we killed him (and various clones of him) at least eight times throughout the long, convoluted campaign that involved various governmental conspiracies, an over-arching secret magic/tech fusion machine/artifact, and several matching pairs of very old magic music boxes holding the souls of couples forbidden to love in their own times. somehow all those things related to each other, but the campaign lasted nearly three years of bi-monthly sessions, and I can't remember all the details perfectly.

Anywho, the party is in Hong Kong, having just been ran out of Seattle by the SPD and Lone Star, with a bounty on our heads from Saeder Krupp (who we had been working for when some fecal matter intersected a powered ventilation device, in a very literal sense). We had actually just met Krusk (his player was new to our group, but familiar with the game rules and setting), and he was helping us to get set up in the area, with the agreement that we would get him out of Hong Kong when we left. To accomplish this, the party splits up a bit. Krusk takes Tim (the face) to a popular watering hole for the criminal powers-that-be, so Tim can find us some work and scope out the scene. Sam and Olaf (Shaman and Rigger), take off to find us a magically-neutral, technology-compatible place to lay low and set up shop for a while. Misha is basically left to his own devices, but decides to check out a bar Krusk told him about that might have connections to black market weapons dealers.

This is a bad choice for multiple reasons. First of all, my character is a recovering alcoholic, and has just managed to stay sober almost a month, with help from the rest of the party. Secondly, my character has very little in the ways of diplomacy at this point (had been putting karma into improving things I already had instead of broadening my skill set). Thirdly, while I am proficient in one-on-one subdual combat, and various ranged weapon skills, I am not at all built for one-on-many close-in tanky-ness (that's actually what we wanted Krusk for).

I walk into the bar without stopping for a pat-down by the enforcer, go up to the bartender, and ask for the biggest bottle of vodka they have. I proceed to drink it, Russian-style, and take a look around, slowly noticing that everyone is keeping one eye on me, and one hand on whatever weapons they have. This tension is broken by some klutzy NPC Ork, bigger than me, who drunkenly bumps into me, and spills HER drink all over the both of us. I go for an athletics check to keep her from slipping, fail miserably, and accidentally cop a feel as she face-plants into my groin. Her liver pulls a fast one, and she instantly becomes 20% more sober, which is enough to be incredibly insulted. Turns out she's not only bigger then me, but is also one of the most reputable arms dealers in the area, and has a reputation to uphold. She does a short, drunken monologue, while spreading the crowd out to give us room to battle. I want no part of it, but she's determined to make me pay for the insult.

Then I get a crazy idea.

I run it by the GM, we fudge some ruling together for it, and proceed with the fight.

I make a modified subdual combat roll against the bar counter, to firmly brace myself against it, and get enough hits to do it right. My "plan" is to basically jump horizontally from the bar out the door, using my high strength, athletics, and the pneumatic jacks in my cyber legs (yes, the rulebook calls them hydraulic jacks, but hydraulics don't move fast enough to provide the jumping bonus they are statted at). I totally have the dicepool for this, and could make it easy, were it not for the room full of bodies plus a huge, angry ork woman between me and the door. Unbeknownst to the GM, I actually have a much more cunning trick I am going to pull, but I need him to think my plan is rubbish. Because of the way I am bracing, she sees what I'm about to do, and decides to charge. That's when I do the unfathomably awesome; I lean back against the counter, pull my knees up to my chest, plant my feet on her gut, make the roll to stop her charge, then ask permission to roll for a jump. The GM, flabbergasted, doesn't get what I'm about to do, and gives me the go ahead. I roll spectacularly well. Better than I have ever rolled in Shadowrun, and better than I have ever rolled since.

So I ask him "How far does she fly?"

I was still bracing myself against the counter, you see, and was practically immobile when I "jumped" against her gut. She was standing on floor that was still wet from spill before, and was caught off-guard by being drunk and my unexpectedly catching her charge. The GM, now realizing what's going on, but more or less powerless to stop it, does some maths and dice rolling on the lady Ork's behalf. Things don't look good...for her. She goes flying like a metahuman pinball, plowing me a straight path to the door and escape. I easily run past the stunned onlookers, making sure to drop my business card and a tear-gas grenade into her lap as I pass her by.

The next day, she contacted me with an apology, and offered my team a job against one of her competitors. Later, I even hooked up with her one time after rescuing her from a corporate death squad raid. But our team soon left Hong Kong, and I forgot all about her...

Until the GM did the final wrap-up epilogue for the campaign, in which I found out she'd not only risen to the top of the arms-dealing ladder in China, but also had given birth to my child. One of the final decisions I got to make for that character was whether or not I accepted her marriage proposal. Of course I did.
kriss1989 16th Mar 2013, 3:39 AM edit delete reply
kriss1989
This is one that happened TO me as a DM.

Okay, so there are these hostile little robots going around, and the party warlock teams up with the wizard to try and use illusions to fast talk the leaders. After a successful string of bluffs, they asked him for his identification code. I sat back smugly as he thought about it. And then he said "6284 x 5^25?"

....he got it right. I proceeded to call the WHYYYY game to a break so WHYYY that my brain WHYYYY could recover. WHYYYY?
Korrick 14th Mar 2013, 10:34 AM edit delete reply
And don't forget the animal that started it all, Martian Flat Cats (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flat_cat), though according to that entry, David Gerrold (author of Trouble with Tribbles) had forgotten about Heinlein's Flat Cat and Heinlein himself thought the idea might have come from a famous 1905 story about guinea pigs.
JohnBobMead 14th Mar 2013, 11:33 AM edit delete reply
I'd clean forgotten about Martian Flat Cats, and also "Pigs is Pigs". However, once reminded of them, yeah, they pertain. And both are dated cultural references. Although, of the pop culture references, "Pigs is Pigs" actually would have the widest distribution in its heyday.

I've never seen Gremlins. Never played KoTOR. Haven't watched TOS in 20+ years, never saw the remake episode.

Did know about rabbets in Australia, though not the details of how they got into the wild.

I have, however, now seen all of season one of Friendship is Magic, having bought the DVDs. Which is the fault of this comic. And I eagerly await how the various storylines get dealt with by NewbieSpud.

And I have strong suspicions that I'm one of the oldest showing up here, what with turning fifty-three later this year. I started playing D&D in 1976 (Memorial Day Weekend), so I predate Advanced Dungeons & Dragons by several years. Most recent rules set I've dealt with is 2nd edition.

Strongly recommend reading "Pigs is Pigs," or whatever the real title is.
JohnBobMead 14th Mar 2013, 11:43 AM edit delete reply
Found it! "Pigs is Pigs" is in Project Gutenberg, as follows: http://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/2004
Lixie 14th Mar 2013, 2:05 PM edit delete reply
I think I read this as much for the comments, mainly Raxon, as the (awesome) comic. :P
Raxon 14th Mar 2013, 3:14 PM edit delete reply
Raxon
Yeah, you know it, baby. I'm awesome, mmhmmm. So relevant.

You know, readership makes or breaks a comic. I've broken it soo many times, and you love me for it.
TheStratovarian 14th Mar 2013, 6:06 PM edit delete reply
The comments just wouldn't be the same without your quips and unique insights. And while a few of us might be a tad saner. I doubt any would trade that for the world.
Sjosten 15th Mar 2013, 8:29 AM edit delete reply
Absolutely. Insanity is just more fun than the alternative.
Castille 14th Mar 2013, 11:13 PM edit delete reply
Re: Rabbits in Australia.
Actually, there are predators. Dingos and hawks have taken advantage of the newly introduced pest, but not in enough numbers. The wild highway cars also account for a small and squishy amount of dead rabbits, but again nowhere near enough.
Now New Zealand, with NO predators at all, that's a whole different kettle of coneys. They had to call the military in a few times to cull the rabbit populations in the South Island.
Just FYI...
Bronymous 15th Mar 2013, 1:16 AM edit delete reply
Bronymous
Kotor reference, 50 points.
Joe England 15th Mar 2013, 8:35 AM edit delete reply
Y'know, it goes without saying, but... oh, God, Fluttershy's so cute.
Ritz Crackerzod 15th Mar 2013, 11:42 AM edit delete reply
Fluttershy, I'll forgive you for never having seen Star trek, but only because you are best pon- er, D&D player.
However, Pinkie's analogy has made her realize the gravity of the situation. Without natural predators around, the tennis ball will spread uncontrollably in its new dessert environment!
Raxon 15th Mar 2013, 11:52 AM edit delete reply
Raxon
I'm gonna come out and say it.

Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra.

More relevant than you think.
Tvtyrant 15th Mar 2013, 2:54 PM edit delete reply
The funny thing about the rabbits is that a less strictly controlled human population (IE one without a heavily centralized government) would probably have been more successful at destroying them. A tribe of people who are constantly trapping and eating rabbits would do wonders, and there would have been a lot less crops for the rabbits to eat because the rabbits would provide most of the food.
Raxon 15th Mar 2013, 5:57 PM edit delete reply
Raxon
But they'd still need to hunt well over their own body weight, or have so many people that without the rabbits, those numbers wouldn't be plausible. And the tribe might be constantly trapping rabbits, but they wouldn't be able to make a sizable dent in the rabbit population unless they were there when the first rabbits were let loose, and got to it early.
Tvtyrant 15th Mar 2013, 8:17 PM edit delete reply
I rather think it depends. If I have 10,000 individuals living in a chiefdom, how many rabbits can that chiefdom consume in a day? Say half the population is directly involved in hunting/trapping rabbits, and we catch 5 a day an individual. Say 25,000 rabbits a day doesn't dent the rabbit population. The human population will inevitably grow faster than the rabbit population, as its growth curtails the rabbit's. The plentiful food supply would create a veritable explosion of population growth, which would only stop due to disease or running out of rabbits.

Similar population explosions have been noted where new food sources are discovered, and they nearly always lead to the extinction or effective extinction of the food source.
CJT 15th Mar 2013, 11:52 PM edit delete reply
The rabbit population literally hit hundreds of millions within a few years of their release.

At that point, trying to get rid of them through human hunting/trapping is like trying to get rid of rats through human trapping: not very effective, except on a very local scale (you can keep them out of your house but not your farm's fields).

In Australia they've mostly been trying biological warfare (introducing two diseases so far that target rabbits). In this sort of situation you can always try introducing the natural predators of the invasive species... but that's been tried elsewhere, and gives you an invasive _predator_.
Ekevoo 15th Mar 2013, 7:11 PM edit delete reply
I am totally Fluttershy in this. Not in the sense that I don't recognize a pattern, but in the sense that often people around me go in tons of popular culture that have nothing to do with the popular culture of where I DID grow up in, and I'm completely clueless throughout.