Page 177 - Letter to Whomever

20th Sep 2012, 6:00 AM
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Letter to Whomever
Average Rating: 5 (2 votes)
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Author Notes:

Newbiespud 20th Sep 2012, 6:00 AM edit delete
Newbiespud
In this page's comments, share a honest-to-goodness life lesson you learned from a roleplaying/gaming experience. For bonus points, share it in the "Dear Princess Celestia" format.

143 Comments:

Raxon 20th Sep 2012, 6:00 AM edit delete reply
Raxon
Dear princess Celestia,

Today I learned that friends need criticism for their deleterious actions, even if they complains of discrimination. If we don't learn from our mistakes, we can't grow. Sometimes, we need to show our friends the right path, even if they choose not to take it. In the end, they'll grow stronger.

Either that, or they'll rage quit, and we won't have to deal with their whining anymore.

Your faithful student, Raxon Dunwich, Lord of mental anguish, Pretty princess of la la land, and King of Inzania.
Destrustor 20th Sep 2012, 6:10 AM edit delete reply
Destrustor
Dear Princess Celestia, today I've learned that the most stupid decisions can sometimes have the best possible outcomes. Also, owning a country is dope.
Also, never try to out-drink a dwarf.

What? You didn't say it had to be good advice! Besides, it's pretty much the only thing I've learned from my games. Everything is so much better since I stopped wondering "is this a good idea for my character?" and learned to just go with whatever is funniest/coolest.

Wait, actually, "don't worry, be happy" is a pretty good life lesson if you think about it.
Digo 20th Sep 2012, 6:10 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned why I, the cleric of the party, should always takes rear guard in the dungeon marching order. This lesson can be summarized in two words:

BACK. STAB.

That's right, the party Hexblade and Wizard backstabbed me today by selling me out the the vampire slaver that we are tasked with defeating. I mean, how can you truely trust your friends if their elements of friendship are about as harmonious as a wall-eyed pegasus on a storm cloud?

And this after I taught them the value of cremating your enemies for the good of the party. Seriously, you can't ressurect a pile of ash. That vampire has to now interview her henchmen for a new number two.
By the way, you're welcome.

And why did my two companions back stab me and left me to hang out to dry in the clutches of the vampire? All for advancing their own adgenda of finding their mutual father. Someone who disowned his own children. Messed up family values that.
But that pretty much lends itself to kids growing up with the same screwed-up sense of self-entitlement and sellout practices that net the cleric out of Peace of Mind.

Good thing the vampire showed up when I was in the hot tub. Blessing the bath into Holy Water was the only thing that saved my naked butt from becoming vamp-chow. Brilliant bit of planning on my part. Always carry some silver powder for just such instances. You never know.

You're welcome for that too.

Your faithful student,
Ovelia Risii
Straw Berry 20th Sep 2012, 6:20 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia:

Today I learned that everyone should be able to be heard, and sometimes, it is the easiest plans that do the most damage.


During our gaming session tonight, we were overlooking one of the newer members who picked a sorcerer to play, and wasn't very secure with the rules. We were going up against a enemy none of us had any experience with and we needed him paralyzed. Our DM had shared the stats with us, so we all knew he had a extraordinarily low dexterity - that is, a six.

When we finally came up with a plan, our sorcerer was still trying to talk to us, but to no avail.

Our sorcerer rolls a natural twenty on his initiative and goes first, and casts Limp Lash, which hits. He rolled a 1d6 die to see how much penalty he's giving the enemy, and he rolls a natural six, causing him to go completely paralyzed.

That's when the sorcerer looked at us and said, "I tried to tell you."

The party's face was priceless.

Your faithful resident of Canterlot,
Straw Berry
BadHorse 20th Sep 2012, 6:28 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

I learned that if you don't hold the hoofs of your friends, they will neglect to bring along money, flashlights, even a sandwich, on journeys of indeterminate length through dark, barren places.

It's a wonder they can dress themselves.

Yours faithfully,

Bad Horse
LoganAura 20th Sep 2012, 6:30 AM edit delete reply
LoganAura
Dear Princess Celestia,

A few days ago, I tried my hand at guest DMing Stairc's game, since he wasn't feeling good, and my nerves got the best of me since it was my first time being the Pony Handler of a live-ish game. I made a few mistakes- forgetting what a nat20 perception roll was actually FOR was one of my biggest ones, even if it didn't change the plot much- but the group mostly just laughed and helped me get back into the flow.

I learned that even if something goes wrong, and you make mistakes, you can always count on your friends to help you back up on that pony that bucked you off and work together to make a fun game.

Your awesome, yet humble, dragon/player/gm, Scales.

PS: Also I learned that Soaring can do a Starlit Songboom, Inky FINALLY had her paranoia work out in her favor, Alcazar is about as good with mares as I am (He got bitch slapped a lot), if scrapper derps in a crowded area he will hit a mare or three in the flank, Stairc can survive 1d100 terrible pun damage, Newbiespud doesn't like me taking his jokes, Scales and heat wave can sleep through a changeling attack, Faded Tome failing a stunts check actually became important, Inky is way to quick to trust ponies (Wait what), and if a changeling impersonates fluttershy, She'll also be terrible with attention and compliments.
Also that a healer changeling explodes with joy and happiness when hearing a Funeral Dirge.
So yeah.
Great fun :3
(The players can add more stuff or explain if need be.)
PSPS: Inky can and WILL attack the dm with slashback if you do 1d4 pun damage against her. So yeah.
Digo 20th Sep 2012, 6:49 AM edit delete reply
... Okay I'm curious about the exploding changling. :)
Zuche 20th Sep 2012, 6:55 AM edit delete reply
Hey, explosions happen all the time. It's the ones that happen twice that make you wonder.
Ranubis 20th Sep 2012, 6:52 AM edit delete reply
Ranubis
"Alcazar is about as good with mares as I am (he got bitch slapped a lot)"

Hey, I suffered for this group, I tell you! Those crazy mares were about to drag off Scrapper for bumping into them, so I attempted to divert their attention. Turns out my offer to treat them to a much more enjoyable night on the town and flashing my bit purse was interpreted in COMPLETELY the wrong way, and I ended up being chased by an irate mob.

Still, it did allow me to run by as a diversion for the rest of the party a little while later, so there’s that.

And Logan did an awesome job as Pony Handler. Great job dude!
LoganAura 20th Sep 2012, 6:56 AM edit delete reply
LoganAura
You got an 11 when the mares were already pissed off at Scrapper dude.

And Digo- Soaring dealt 2d12 to a vul 5 changeling, got a nat 12 on it with like +lots from items and stuff. He dealt ALL of its hp at once. It exploded. Twice.

None of my enemies even got bloodied in that battle...

Sad Dragon :(

But glad to hear you liked my role Cliff!
Digo 20th Sep 2012, 8:48 AM edit delete reply
Huh, I guess Applejack was wrong. You CAN explode twice.
Zuche 20th Sep 2012, 10:35 AM edit delete reply
That is new.
Oblivious 20th Sep 2012, 12:38 PM edit delete reply
Oblivious
Even better, the changeling died happy, since he loved the Dirge of Despair.

Must be the most goth changeling ever, to love a funeral march.
banjo2E 20th Sep 2012, 4:18 PM edit delete reply
banjo2E
"WE APOLOGIZE FOR THE INCONVENIENCE."
HRH Luna of Equestria 21st Sep 2012, 8:28 PM edit delete reply
ATTENTION! ATTENTION! BEGINNING IMMEDIATELY ALL SPECIALME SPECIALBOOMS ARE PROHIBITED. REPEAT, THEY ARE PROHIBITED. WE ARE TIRED OF THEM. IF YOU WANT YOUR GARISHLY COLORED PEGASUS OC TO HAVE A SIGNATURE MOVE, FOR THE LOVE OF US COME UP WITH SOMETHING NEW.

~L
Videocrazy 22nd Sep 2012, 2:11 AM edit delete reply
Videocrazy
It's not the first time a failed check's had positive events. Something I'm sure Alcazar and Soaring Song know very well.
Lyntermas 20th Sep 2012, 6:49 AM edit delete reply
Lyntermas
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned a little about how preconceptions about an environment can be dangerous. I knew the good-aligned temple had been infiltrated with evil cultists, but I never expected the dangers the temple itself already possessed. This included a paladin who jumped to conclusions, a dire lion, broken stairs, broken bells, and a freaking death orb. In short, all new locales are assumed to be dangerous until expressly proven otherwise.

Also, I learned that Grease is a very useful spell. And that you should read EVERYTHING. And that stuff that's behind barricaded doors may be hazardous to your health.

Your faithful student,
Lyntermas
Zuche 20th Sep 2012, 6:50 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Sometimes, players need to be reminded that they are not their characters. When you find your character with no choice but to betray the group, bring your situation before the other players. Whether they find their delight in the brawl, at the planning table, or on the medal podium, remember that they are all in the game for one common objective: to have a good time together.


Thanks for this opportunity to work out my thoughts about an incident last night. There's a lot of energy being wasted on assigning (or taking) blame that could be put to better use. It takes time to find constructive ways to address matters like this. I may need to employ Twilight Sparkle's writing staff.
Plynic 20th Sep 2012, 6:59 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

The one who uses their abilities the flashiest is frequently the one who draws the most attention, good or bad, but not always the one capable of the most impressive feats. Subtlety has its place, and I shouldn't underestimate someone just because they're quiet.

Also, I need to keep my eye on that rogue. Stealing the sentries' dice from them mid-Craps game, holding them at swordpoint, and rolling snake-eyes? Priceless!

Your devoted scribe,
Plynic Di Irthosi Vur Irthir
[witty name goes here] 14th Jun 2013, 2:08 PM edit delete reply
Found out what the last sentence means: "writes of secrets and knowledge". Nice.
Demonu 20th Sep 2012, 7:10 AM edit delete reply
Demonu
Dear Princess Celestia,

Over the past weeks, I have learned that, despite being in the same generational/age group, I cannot expect my players to have the same frame of reference as my players.

But let's be honest here: anyone who grew up in the 90's knows Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers and is it really that far a stretch to expect players to be able to sing the Spongebob theme song?

That aside, I also learned that players tend to roll natural 20's at trivial things but botch up majorly when it's important. This makes for all kinds of interesting situations but that's not necessarily a bad thing. Just thought I should mention it. Page filler, if you will.

Another thing that has come to my attention is that unicorns seem popular as of lately. I now have a party of 4 unicorns (with a potential 5th) and 1 earth pony. It gets all kinds of crazy now that the earth pony's player has figured out he can have an higher Arcana rating that most of said unicorns, something he'd undoubtedly want to rub in their faces.

But most importantly, I learned that no matter the people, be they from all over the world (seriously, I've got 5 time zones to manage), you can get a ragtag group of misfits working together to create something magical. Right now, they're planning to talk the eldritch abomination into becoming friends. I hope your insurance policy coveres property damage caused by Ancient Ones, your Majesty.

Some guy with way too much time on his hands,

Demonu

PS: I know you're busy with all kinds of royal duties but losing the Necroponicon is just asking for it.
Philadelphus 20th Sep 2012, 3:07 PM edit delete reply
Philadelphus
Wait, what? How does Mouse get higher Arcana? This is something I missed while I was gone, isn't it?

Also, we weren't planning on talking to Grogar; we were planning to try and persuade his marine monstrosity to turn on him. (At least that's what I was planning. All bets are off for the rest of the party.)

Finally, I'm sorry my unusual childhood spoiled your references. :p
Demonu 20th Sep 2012, 4:16 PM edit delete reply
Demonu
By eldritch abomination, I meant the marine monster. And Mouse could get a higher Arcana by taking the new dragon hybrid destiny thingymajig.
Hayatecooper 20th Sep 2012, 9:22 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia
I learned that having a DM that allows you to play a kleptomaniac, knife loving, erotic fanifc writer in a pony game is a godsend. And that Earth Ponies can move submarines with there faces.

Your faithful student.
Hayate(Mouse.)
Guest 21st Sep 2012, 12:19 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia
I learned that crazed fiancees are more threatening than eldritch abominations, that gems can solve many problems (but may also cause eye injuries), narcolepsy leads to highly amusing pictures, rolling critical hits in combat is awesome, plates are deadly weapons and that singing alestorm songs over skype always works.
Zarhon 21st Sep 2012, 12:19 PM edit delete reply
Zarhon
Edit: Gah, didn't login.

Dear Princess Celestia,

I learned that crazed fiancees are more threatening than eldritch abominations, that gems can solve many problems (but may also cause eye injuries), narcolepsy leads to highly amusing pictures, rolling critical hits in combat is awesome, plates are deadly weapons and that singing alestorm songs over skype always works.

Night Owl

P.S. Don't trust Mouse with explosives.
Fury of the Tempest 22nd Sep 2012, 8:05 AM edit delete reply
How exactly do you RPG with people all over the world? I've always been interesting in RPing but I've never been able to do it because I didn't know anyone locally that did RPG's
Demonu 22nd Sep 2012, 11:30 AM edit delete reply
Demonu
Skype and asking around mostly. Such as on the pony tales forum.
Colin 25th Sep 2012, 5:30 AM edit delete reply
Look up roll20.net as it's just what you need. Haven't used it myself, though /tg/ has reported some success with it.
Jellybean 20th Sep 2012, 7:26 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned that there comes a time when you have to ask yourself why you're doing something. Not to turn away from the goals you've set out, but instead to remember the purpose behind what you're doing. Losing sight of your goals is the first step to losing sight of yourself.

Your faithful student, Jellybean
Masterweaver 20th Sep 2012, 7:33 AM edit delete reply
Masterweaver
To her Illuminated Majesty, Princess Celestia Livegiver

There are many lessons I have learned from role playing. Once, I found that vengeance takes second place to repairing the damage done by evil. Another time I discovered that parenting is not about protecting a child, but providing them a future. There was also the time I realized that, even though an authority figure may have disappeared for reasons unknown, it is unwise to assume that they have grown incompetent...

That was also the time I learned that some people will always judge you based on your friend's actions.

But truly, what I have really learned in my many forays into the realm of multi-author fiction is this: Friendship will always make firm bonds. Love is selfless and always seeks to make the loved happy. And no tragedy, no horror is too dark to rise from.

Your consistent traveler in the realms of mania and marvels,
Masterweaver
Teller of Tales
Bard of Awesomeness
Demonu 20th Sep 2012, 8:02 AM edit delete reply
Demonu
Oh, you're back?

People over at the forum were wondering where you went...
Ramsus 21st Sep 2012, 2:07 AM edit delete reply
Ramsus
For the record, I was voting for the Abyss.
Masterweaver 22nd Sep 2012, 6:16 AM edit delete reply
Masterweaver
Yeah sorry, the forum made way to RL.
Scrounge 20th Sep 2012, 7:37 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned the value of persistence. It's not about who does damage first, but about who ends the game. And even if you fail, it's not over, even if you receive a gaping chest wound for your efforts. Persist, push through, and you'll come back, better and stronger than before, with new allies by your side and new weapons in your arsenal. When you fall, the only thing to do is to rise again, better and stronger than before. We're only defeated when we choose to stop fighting.

Your faithful student,
Jerry Parker of the Slifer Red dorm.
Guest 20th Sep 2012, 7:56 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia(may your ears rot and be turned into poor-quality glue),

Today I learned that occasionally, just occasionally, your toady servants of your tyrannical regime will respond positively to a polite request. Therefore, I have learned that being pleasant is usually a good idea until you have nothing more to gain from it. No doubt that's how you took power, your sunniness.

Never yours to command,
Banana Nut Sundae

P.S. I don't care that I'm stealing a gag from OoTS, this opportunity is too good to pass up.

*KABOOM!*
Crimson Doom 20th Sep 2012, 7:58 AM edit delete reply
Crimson Doom
Dang it, wasn't logged in! Still, that was surprisingly fun, writing a letter in-character. I may have to incorporate this into an actual game...
CJT 20th Sep 2012, 1:18 PM edit delete reply
We had a Realms campaign many years ago that featured an enemy who loved the same trick. At various innocuous times, especially when we were distracted, a messenger would come up with a parchment for one or more of us.

These would generally be signed: "-Melvin (*BOOM!*)".

My character fell for one of these even after being warned about it ("distracted" works extremely well).
sunbeam 20th Sep 2012, 8:07 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,
Recently, I learned that violence is rarely the answer. Yes, an axe to the head will convince a bandit to lay off, but so will splitting a small sapling in two and then just grinning at him. Yes, a dagger pressed against someone's throat provides +4 to intimidation checks, but the objective can be achieved even easier if you just offer to cook the man a stew. And if you have to lace the with heightened sleep potions, then maybe the knife method would've been better in the first place.
Quick Talking and a wide variety of knowledge is the safest way out of a situation. And when you're an unarmored axe-swinging quasi-immortal on the run from a group of knight templars, the safest way is the best way.
But really, even when you're not, making disembowlment threats is just a bad idea. Even if you are willing to barrage people with silverware, it's still so much more productive to stay rational and argue with them until doomsday.
...So basically, I learned nothing I shouldn't have already realized.
Yours Student,
Sunbeam
Digo 20th Sep 2012, 8:52 AM edit delete reply
Last line = pure win.
Zodo 20th Sep 2012, 8:30 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia-

Today, I learned that when a former artilleryman is napping before the start of the game, it can be difficult to wake him up by calling his name.

Whispering the word 'incoming' is very very effective, however.

Your faithful student,
Zodo
Digo 20th Sep 2012, 8:31 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

I have been studying the the Elements of Harmony on Earth as they relate to the bipedal creatures called humans. If there is anything I learned about my "friends", it's that friendship works in a completely screwed up way here--

Jimmy: Element of Snarking
(Laughter)
If there is a lame joke to be had, Jimmy has it. Seriously, the only thing not funny about Jimmy, is Jimmy himself.

Harmony: Element of Plot Kicking (Loyalty)
When the chips are down, you can count on Harmony to wait until the enemy bends over to pick them up before she gives them a swift buck to the rear. She's so dependable at holding the line that I can time egg boiling to it.

Mason: Element of Obviousness (Honesty)
If you ever find yourself suffering a stroke in the middle of the adventure, allow Mason to catch you up on all the important details- your name, color of coat, number of hooves, etc.

Paul: Element of Its-All-Good (Generosity)
After a long day of fighting evil and traveling, Paul drinks. Like a fish. He also will ensure that everyone around him is bizzed so that we all can partly understand his slurred half-conscious thought pattern.
It's usually plaid.

Sister Nun: Element of Doing My Own Thing (Kindness)
The lady of the cloth who has recently dumped the party to pursue her own brand of justice. When the recent cathedral in Zurich collapsed, we weren't anywhere near it. Couldn't have collapsed on a nicer person.

This of course leaves me as the Element of Magic, but I think the real magic trick is how to herd these cats together to succeed in our quest. Is there an elemento fo Miracles?
We could use one of those.

Your Newly Faithful Student,

The Great & Powerful Trixie
EricaC78 20th Sep 2012, 8:37 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned not to trust Sean Connery, for he is an evil, evil man.

Sincerely, everyone in the party who had their parents killed by him.
Nohbdi 20th Sep 2012, 8:40 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia;

Today I learned, first and foremost, that no matter how unusual, oddball or downright weird others might think you are;

No matter how many times they've seen you take perfectly ordinary items and do something utterly insane with them that somehow manages to work;

No matter how many of your inventions - be it a Lightning Gun, Gnomish Ballista, or Giant Spiked Hamster-Ball of Doom - they've seen you successfully build;

Turning a fortress into a giant robotic golem will still cause a ten-minute break while they try to remember how to breathe.

Your faithful mad scientist,
Nohbdi
Zeeth 20th Sep 2012, 11:25 AM edit delete reply
Someone reads Girl Genius...
CJT 20th Sep 2012, 1:24 PM edit delete reply
I see your Girl Genius, and raise you my RPG campaign plans that involve shipping GLaDOS and Castle Heterodyne...
Greywander 20th Sep 2012, 4:03 PM edit delete reply
Greywander
Huh, I thought of the Giant of Babil from Final Fantasy IV. Actually, there's quite a few things out of Japan that involve giant robot fortresses.
Nohbdi 21st Sep 2012, 6:20 AM edit delete reply
Actually...this is all direct from one 2nd-ed D&D game I played in about ten years ago. 'Horse' was a very, very fun character, although I'm honestly still surprised what my DM let me get away with.
Sewicked 20th Sep 2012, 8:54 AM edit delete reply
I learned that critiquing job performance is much more effective technique for dealing with bandits than just laying waste to them. Not only do you beat them up, you discourage them.
Guest 20th Sep 2012, 9:16 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

I learned that sometimes karma has a fun sense of humor, and that those who play fair will get their reward in the end. The min-maxing duelist who subtlety constructed an impossibly high BAB found himself rolling nothing but ones. And the unoptimizied but well RPed Paladin? Well, he seems to have an uncanny ability to roll natural 20s....vs undead bosses.....with a sun blade....while smiting.
XandZero2 20th Sep 2012, 9:25 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

I've learned that when a group is united by a common cause, there's little they can not do...

-Reversely, I've also learned that when a group is not united by a common cause, they tend to go on killing sprees and ritualistically slay all of their friends in order to appease a dark overlord who intends to lop off their heads in gratitude afterwards anyway...

So in the future, I know that when building a team, I should make sure everypony has mutual goals - or I should just avoid them meeting up with a dark overlord...

Either way.

Your faithful student in friendship, fun, and mild mayhem,
-XandZero2
AnimeDoom 20th Sep 2012, 9:37 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

I've learned not to ask random people for a reward after saving their life, I also learned not to then try and extort a reward from the ungrateful jerk by threatening to burn down their place of business and then follow through when they still refuse. A few minutes later I learned why I shouldn't play Chaotic Neutral characters with control of fire, it didn't end well for me.

Your faithful student
-AnimeDoom
Chris 20th Sep 2012, 9:53 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned another important difference between the style of play we had twenty years ago, and the way people game today.

Back then, foes who were vastly more powerful than the PCs (they call these "out of depth" today) were not uncommon, and weren't always easy to recognize as such. Can the fourth-level party take on that giant if they work together? There's no easy way to find out without risking a TPK. So most parties back then were very careful to avoid attacking a foe unless they were sure they could win, and would retreat well before half the party was knocked unconscious, if it looked like they might be in over their heads.

Many players today have different expectations. They assume that any monster or opponent they encounter will be at an appropriate "challenge rating" unless it's really, REALLY obvious they're in over their heads--a red dragon against a level three group, for example. So they don't retreat, or make plans to avoid the encounter. They rush in and attack, and then get upset when they realize they can't win.

At first, I thought they were just being idiots. But then, I realized that they way they wanted to play wasn't wrong--just different. They needed clues to let them know when they could or couldn't reasonably expect to win a fight, and there was no reason I couldn't do that for them.

They're slowly learning that not every foe has to be killed, and I'm learning how to create a world which gives the PCs plenty of opportunities to succeed, and plenty of hints when they can't.

Your faithful student,

Chris
Zuche 20th Sep 2012, 10:44 AM edit delete reply
Thank you, Chris. That's particularly helpful right now.
Chris 20th Sep 2012, 9:04 PM edit delete reply
Happy to help! It was a difficult lesson to learn, at first, and more than a couple parties were annihilated before this letter was ready to send. But sometimes, a little flexibility goes a long way.
Xander Cruize 20th Sep 2012, 9:59 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned that you can't judge people based on their actions alone, because good people can do really bad and stupid things without thinking about it.

Yours truly,

Xander Cruize
SilverDemonWolf 20th Sep 2012, 10:03 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Our group has learned to NEVER take our eyes off the Fighter. Or let him go off on his own. Or even open his mouth.

Otherwise, he could deliberately spring the trap that we were all walking around (and set off alarms while he's at it), charge into a very one-sided battle by himself while the rest of the group is still half a mile away, or annoy our quest giver so much that we don't get any reward for clearing out an entire haunted prison.

Also, mouthing off to the big bad and her henchman when you're the only one there and everyone else had the bright idea to beat feet = bad idea. Only a Deux Ex Machina on the DM's part kept our fighter alive that time.

Your faithful student (and very annoyed magic user who is just ITCHING for a chance to fireball the fighter),

SilverDemonWolf
Colin 25th Sep 2012, 5:43 AM edit delete reply
This could be our Lawful Stupid paladin.
Boden King 20th Sep 2012, 10:34 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned how important it is to remain honest and truthful to your friends and comrades. Lies and deceits only cause strife, mistrust, and death. The men, women, and creatures you travel with must know that they can count on you no matter what.

Your humble fighter,

Boden King
Umiyuri Papaeyra 20th Sep 2012, 10:47 AM edit delete reply
Umiyuri Papaeyra
Dear Princess Celestia,

Last night I learned that if you want to change your name on Comicfury, only the options page will say anything about it having changed!

Your faithful student, Trying To Become DoubleCross.
terrycloth 20th Sep 2012, 10:48 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned that even if a Rain of Fire's nominal damage is non-lethal, there is still a risk of fatalities when you use it as a distraction to escape from an invading army. Especially if the village has thatched roofs.
terrycloth 20th Sep 2012, 10:52 AM edit delete reply
*reads other letters*

'Chaotic Neutral characters should not be trusted with fire magic.' Yes, that should go in there too.
Raxon 20th Sep 2012, 11:29 AM edit delete reply
Raxon
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today, I taught everyone that the Chaotic Neutral bard is never to be left to guard those magical items you've found, but you don't want weighing you down throughout the whole dungeon.

Your faithful student, Raxon Dunwich, Lord of mental anguish, Pretty princess of la la land, and King of Inzania.
Destrustor 20th Sep 2012, 12:31 PM edit delete reply
Destrustor
My chaotic neutral mage of mass destruction(homemade class) who's also recently turned into a magma dragon and whose spell list contains about 90% fire spells objects to that, sir!
He's a very respected and trusted high-ranking member of the empire of evil. Has a mile-high mage tower with which to rain destruction on the hapless masses from above and everything.
Raxon 20th Sep 2012, 1:05 PM edit delete reply
Raxon
Note that I said bard. CN bards are known for being troublesome.
Destrustor 20th Sep 2012, 2:40 PM edit delete reply
Destrustor
I was replying to the "CN mages should not be trusted with fire magic" part of terrycloth's comment, actually.
Siberian 20th Sep 2012, 10:56 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Luna (Cause everypony else writes to Celestia)

Today I learned that being the very lucky newbie elf ranger can sometimes be a good thing. Especially when your the one who picks up red dragon leather armor.

Your Faithful Subject
Siberian

Have only played D&D of any kind once. Had an elven ranger who got the armor. Ended dodging all of the enemies attacks in the room after that. The DM even changed out dice half way though it.
Matticus 20th Sep 2012, 10:58 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned that throwing a pebble at someone conversing with a group of people is a terrible way to get someone's attention. You're going to miss your intended target and end up owing a favor to an irate Petyr Baelish.

Your faithful student,
Matticus
deeman45 20th Sep 2012, 11:06 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned that you should always share your plans with your fellow party. Even if none of your party members plan ahead or show any degree of strategy 90% of the time, the exact moment you make a seemingly oddball move as part of a grand scheme on your end, you'll find cries of protest because you've inadvertently wrecked some of the similar plans of your other party members.

Sharing is important, Princess Celestia. I think everyone would get along much better if we all knew what not to do to destroy one another's well-made plans.

Your resolute student, deeman45.
Raxon 20th Sep 2012, 11:24 AM edit delete reply
Raxon
Dear princess Celestia,

Today I learned just how good it feels to write someone a heartfelt letter, and how wonderful it is to receive such a letter from a close friend.

I also learned that asking people to phrase their comments in the form of a letter can make your comments section hilariously long.

Your faithful student, Raxon Dunwich, Lord of mental anguish, Pretty princess of la la land, and King of Inzania.
Bristle Whisker Catfish 20th Sep 2012, 11:40 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia

I have learned that it is generally a bad idea to use the holy relic of the God of Fire as a pointing stick to emphasise when I point at a house and ask my friends "Why don't we burn the place?". The explosion was pretty though.

Your Faithful Student,
Catfish
ShadowDragon8685 20th Sep 2012, 12:52 PM edit delete reply
ShadowDragon8685
Dear HRH Princess Celestia of Equestria,

I have heard that you enjoy receiving mail containing life lessons and experiences from others; therefore, I have felt the inclination to pen this missive.


Recently, it has dawned on me that no matter how well you know friends, they remain unpredictable and erratic, even when you think you know what they're going to do. In a related note, my friends learned the hard way that it is excessively unwise to proceed without the reinforcements offered by your friends, especially when you choose to confront a difficult and powerful foe on your own, in an arena of combat which is his specialty and which you are next-to-hopeless in.

They then proceeded to demonstrate to me the value of teamwork, especially its applicability in the field of administering emergency medical care in the back of a moving vehicle. The Hermetic Mage will live to run the Shadows another day, though he may never again project himself onto the Astral to engage a combatmage with a weapon focus in astral combat, which would likely be wise.

Additionally, they then simultaneously demonstrated the values of objectivity and mercy when they had the combatmage who nearly killed their friend dead to rights, and choose not to murder him in light of the fact that they had, after all, come and started the fight with him in the first place. Instead, they simply completed their assignment as ordered, hospitalizing him with grievous, but not terminal, injuries, demonstrating objectivity despite the present opportunity for vengeance.


Through it all, though, they seemed to be having fun, which is the important part.

Sincerely yours,
Shadow.
Urthdigger 20th Sep 2012, 1:23 PM edit delete reply
Urthdigger
Dear Princess Celestia:

Today I learned that you shouldn't always consider people at face value. Sometimes, someone might seem to be your greatest enemy, when all along they were your best friend.

Learn to talk things out with people, instead of just assuming they are acting out of malice. Or, if all else fails, go on a grand adventure with them for a couple months. That tends to patch things up too.

Your Faithful Student,
Urthdigger.
CocoaNut 20th Sep 2012, 1:29 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,
Today, I learned that, with enough luck, you can get an advance on your reward from the king. And that advance will be a bottle of wine.
Sincerely,
Cocoa Nut Cakery

Dear Princess Celestia,
Today, I learned that there are mechanics in D&D for alcohol consumption.
Sincerely,
Cocoa Nut Cakery

P.S. Your ass is huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuge. I think that's hot.

Dear Princess Celestia,
Today, I learned that clerics don't like to be around people that are drunk when they're before the king. Also that "cure light wounds" cures drunkenness.
Sincerely,
Cocoa Nut Cakery

(Yes, these were actual things that I learned... in my first D&D session of the latest game I've played)

So... is RD referencing this?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F-CHG_To7Ag
Blade Tiger 20th Sep 2012, 1:30 PM edit delete reply
Dear GM Celestia,

I've learned that one must never, under ANY circumstances, make assumptions or jump to conclusions. GMs like to mislead and prey on people who make assumptions, and doing so results in misinterpretation of the plot at best, and character death at worst. If a GM leaves out a seemingly important detail, they are not being negligent. Everything happens for a reason, and everything should be questioned and examined.

Your faithful player,
Blade Tiger
TDR 20th Sep 2012, 1:34 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia.

Today we learned, NOT TO GO IN THE BUCKING WELL!!!
Lyntermas 20th Sep 2012, 1:56 PM edit delete reply
Lyntermas
...Gonna go out on a limb here and guess Call of Cthulu.
CJT 20th Sep 2012, 1:39 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Recently I've learned all over again to appreciate friends who come to each others' aid. I've been on the receiving end of that many times, and was on the giving end of that once.

Hearing "We're in over our heads; I hope the cavalry gets here to bail us out soon" responded to with "We *are* the cavalry" was a sobering moment. Being experienced and good at one's job has its downsides.

I've since taken steps to make sure that we can contact the true power-brokers of our city-state from the field. We've had to call for their help twice by mundane means, but that isn't always an option.

Now the commander-at-arms has threatened to appoint me as his successor. The fun does not end. You have my admiration and my sympathies for being the one in charge of your own domain.

Your respectful guest,
Sir Corin of Fallon
Kiana 20th Sep 2012, 2:41 PM edit delete reply
I've got two for you today:

Dear Princess Celestia,

Today, I learned that no matter how loyal, helpful and strong willed a friend they may be, it is still a terrible idea to let the party sorcerer drink heavily before meeting Princess Luna.

Please understand that the unicorn in question now understands her mistake and has entered rehab.

With sincerest regrets,
Stormy Sky
P.S. Even though our names are similar, the drunk was SKYE STORM, thank you.


Dear Princess Celestia,

For many years I was blind to the true efforts for good that you and your citizens put forth. I thought that I had been abandoned, along with many others, but an uncaring regime. But I understand that I was wrong.

I have also learned that, regardless of past mistakes, redemption is a possibility for anyone... And that forgiveness is the greatest force I have ever known.

I shall endeavor to prove your faith was well placed,
Hearth, formerly Flame Scar of the Seekers of Midnight
Lycanthromancer 20th Sep 2012, 2:49 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned to run background checks on new DMs BEFORE they gang-rape my baby dragon character with a tribe of ogres.

Your faithful student,
Lycanthromancer
Zuche 21st Sep 2012, 7:37 AM edit delete reply
Dear Lycanthromancer,

Your DM has been approved as cargo for our next moon lauch.

Sincerely,
Princess Celestia
Guest 20th Sep 2012, 3:03 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

I learned never to plan for more that one session of play... and even then, make your plans a loose as possible. Your players will end whatever plot you had, best just run with the hole they dig themselves.

Your faithful subject,
Greg
Kalisan 20th Sep 2012, 3:23 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,
Sunday I learned that appearances may be deceiving and the drow ranger holding an unconscious child may really have just found him in an ally.
Your faithful student,
Kalisan, Cleric of Corellion
The MunchKING 21st Sep 2012, 11:19 AM edit delete reply
The MunchKING
I REALLY don't want to know what the drow was doing carving up his allies and finding unconcious children do I??
DB 20th Sep 2012, 3:27 PM edit delete reply
In addition to pen-and-paper role-playing, I’ve participated in several role-playing MUCKs administered by a friend who did a very good job in gathering good players and creating interesting settings.

One of these was The Redoubt, a region of space with a network of portals that, at some point in the distant past, had failed catastrophically. It took centuries to come back up, and did so in a fragmentary fashion even then. This left the Redoubt as a pocket network of worlds with long-isolated and often regressed populations.

I ended up more or less cajoled and bullied into running the highest-ranking character in the immediate RP setting—a newly enfoeffed earl, a second son of an existing noble house, given a swatch of virgin territory on a newly opened world. In effect, he was lord over the entire play area!

Overall, I was very proud of the character and how I handled him, garnering praise from the administrator and a few other players for his richly textured, larger-than-life personality. A number of incidents stand out in my mind, but none more than this particular anecdote.

It was a particularly long, intense session involving a handful of characters closeted in the earl’s study, being grilled by him in the wake of some unpleasant developments. Due to differing cultural imperatives, deeply-laid machinations, and colliding plotlines, everyone was frustratingly evasive in their answers to the earl’s questions. He was a fairly patient and forebearing individual by nature, but still he was a noble unaccustomed to this sort of prevarication, and finally his patience wore out. He ordered people to come clean and tell him what the hell was going on.

And they did. Instantly.

Everyone—including me—was fully into character, playing them like violins, and the result was a tableau of shockingly raw emotional power. The individuals who moments before had been doing everything they could to evade the earl’s questions now, after a simple verbal command, laid bare all the answers.

Moreover, an epiphany struck me like lightning: This is the nature of power, why people seek it and crave it, and how it can corrupt when a simple command can sweep all resistance before it. In that moment I understood as I never had the drives of politicians running for office, dictators gazing down from their balconies, dukes and kings and emperors, and slaves whispering to triumphant generals, “You are but a man.”
Mudcrab King 20th Sep 2012, 3:43 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia

Today i learned that even though teir 6 classes cant do anything worth doing they still deserve respect for trying and you should always keep them around and not show off to make them feel inatiquate, unless they get uppity.

Your faithful student the Warblade Vaelia.
Malroth 20th Sep 2012, 6:45 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia

Today i learned that even though tier 2 classes cant do anything worth doing they still deserve respect for trying and you should always keep them around and not show off to make them feel inatiquate, unless they get uppity.

Sincerely The wizard
Degulus 20th Sep 2012, 3:43 PM edit delete reply
Dear Horse Shaped Sun Goddess

Today I learned that my conscience, and in fact everyone's conscience, is provided by a group of Lawful Good mindflayers.

Needless to say I no longer trust morality as it is a form of mind control and now make all decisions based on logic and fear.

Mostly fear.

Another Deity's student,
Narron the (increasingly) paranoid Wizard

On a more serious note I once learned to not avoid being predictable. Just because a single spell happens to be both your first and last resort and your answer to every situation doesn't mean you should try to resort to it less... sometimes it's your specialty because it works.

"I cast sleep!" has settled many arguments with NPCs and turned the tide in many battles.
Malroth 20th Sep 2012, 3:49 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia

Today I learned that If you purposefully point out to the DM that your new 3rd Multiclassed Bard has a Diplomacy modifier of +36 that all your encounters will be mindless undead.
Kiana 20th Sep 2012, 5:17 PM edit delete reply
Your DM is bad and s/he should feel bad.

They should've made a situation where you can use Diplomacy, but still fail at it. =D It's so much more fun than just making your strong point useless.
Malroth 20th Sep 2012, 6:42 PM edit delete reply
To be Honest It was somewhat expected and planned for, He was so scared of the possibilities of 50+ diplomacy rolls from the bard, he played right into the hands of the no roleplaying just smash barbarian and the Meglomanicial necromancer.
The Guest 20th Sep 2012, 3:52 PM edit delete reply
Dear Newbiespud,

Your readers have way too much time on their hooves and are far too willing to write to fictional characters.

Also, Princess Celestia must get a lot of mail.

Also, I am full of it.

Your loyal reader (who doesn't take himself seriously, so neither should anyone else, and this title is too long, I need to work on that, and oh god, why can't I stop, someone help me),

The Guest
tuxgeo 20th Sep 2012, 4:04 PM edit delete reply
tuxgeo
Dear Princess Celestia,

Last night I heeded the call of betterment, and fondged. ("Arrrr," for Pirate Day.) Months ago, I waxed prolix and learned that I couldn't say all of that in any one round; and such verbosity usually comes off as mere "bossiness" anyway.

Today I learned from DoubleCross' post that ComicFury's ways don't like name-changes.

Your fretful obstrempth,
Hackamackerel Gottafilter, or "tuxgeo"
incandescens 20th Sep 2012, 4:17 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

In the not too distant past, I have learned that when my players write character flaws into their character's background history, what they are actually doing is begging me to insert an opportunity to exercise or resist said flaws into the upcoming campaign. Really. They love me for it. And they often don't really care if it's heroic resistance to flaws or tragic/comic indulgence in said flaws, as long as the play is good.

Your admiring student,

An Amber DRPG GM

(admittedly, the sort of player who likes playing ADRPG may have something to do with this point of view)
Lawxl 20th Sep 2012, 4:44 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia; today I learned that poisoning people with hydra excrement is likely to get you punched in the face.
Greywander 20th Sep 2012, 4:48 PM edit delete reply
Greywander
Dear Princess Celestia,
I learned that you're not always as smart as you might think you are, and that jumping to conclusions can lead to a conga line of mistaken assumptions, mistaken identities, bad planning, misidentified solutions or goals, and just generally failing at being a cunning strategist. I came this close to physically assaulting a filly after convincing myself she was actually some sort of evil spirit in disguise. I probably would have lost, too.

Also, when encountering somepony new, ask about their appearance instead of assuming you know what they look like. Pink and blue are not similar colors at all.

And lastly, it probably isn't a good idea to punch the physical manifestation of one of the Elements of Harmony in the face, especially if they weren't responsible for what happened. But I guess we'll never know, now, will we?

Your faithful student,
Strangeknot the Derpy Wizard
6 ̰9
LoganAura 20th Sep 2012, 5:18 PM edit delete reply
LoganAura
I have to say, strange. I'm honored that my game is the one you learned something from :D

Another lesson: If you Assume you make an A** out of U and ME.
ShadowDragon8685 20th Sep 2012, 5:37 PM edit delete reply
ShadowDragon8685
Oh, come ON! you guys can't just hint at a story that good and leave us hanging like that!

Details, ponies! We crave the details!
LoganAura 20th Sep 2012, 6:02 PM edit delete reply
LoganAura
You want details?
http://comicfury.com/forum/viewthread.php?id=11431&page=1
Here's the thread for you.
It'll take way to bucking long to try and explain.
Strange's story is going to be fanfic/exclusive or after City finishes his post.

(At least I THINK strange is talking about the right one. Where else is there a blue Pinkie?)
Blake Black 20th Sep 2012, 5:08 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia.

Today I learned that just because griefers give you a hard time doesn't mean you should give others a hard time. There is a time and place for everything and the time and place for giving grief is in the battlegrounds when you're totally pwning those uberjerk Allie griefers.

Your faithful shaman and student
Blake Black
Akouma 20th Sep 2012, 6:41 PM edit delete reply
Akouma
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned...

Ugh, writer's block. I assure you, Princess, that at some point I learned something somewhere. Promise.

Your faithful gamer,
Akouma
Jason Shadow 20th Sep 2012, 7:35 PM edit delete reply
Jason Shadow
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned a great many things. Chief amongst them are the following:

1. A little boredom can go a long way, but dropping a hapless writer into a land filled with candy-colored ponies and watching him have a nervous breakdown usually provides hours of entertainment.

2. Just because the embodiment of Chaos and Strife is currently a lawn ornament doesn't mean he's any less of a smartass.

3. Never use the full extent of your powers of Coincidence unless you know exactly what will transpire... or unless you enjoy watching horrifyingly strange, Rube Goldberg-esque events unfold.

4. It is possible to fit exactly 263 parasprites in an average barrel if you cram them in hard enough.

5. Never trap aforementioned hapless writer in a room with a drunken musician-slash-cryptozoologist.

6. Creating a paradox will shatter the universe, but enough metaphysical duct tape will get it back to working order in no time.

7. Always take into consideration the feelings of those closest to you. Additionally, goodwill and the spirit of compromise can help you avoid a whole mess of trouble.

Sorry about the state I left Equestria in. We're good, yes?

Your friendly extradimensional spirit of shadow,
Arcane Dark (also known as Jason Shadow)

PS: Mind if I drop in for a quick lunch with Luna next Thursday?
Sei 20th Sep 2012, 8:28 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned that so long as you and your enemy run the same speed, sometimes the best plan of action is to just keep running in circles until they leave you alone. That'll show everyone next time they make jokes about the Wizard being last alive.

Your student,
Sei
Xolvomir 20th Sep 2012, 11:53 PM edit delete reply
Xolvomir
Dear Princess Celestia,

I learned that no matter how frighteningly, shamefully, horrifically hopeless your situation might appear, you must never give up. You may be an unarmed, unarmored Sorcerer with no spells left, and you may currently be in the jaws of a red dragon, but that's no reason to resign yourself to your fate. You may just get a 20 and threaten a crit. You may get a second 20 and confirm the crit. You may get a third 20 and punch the dragon in the eye so hard that when you pull your arm back out, it's covered in brain matter and the dragon instantly dies. You never know unless you try.
Ramsus 21st Sep 2012, 2:25 AM edit delete reply
Ramsus
Dear Princess Celestia

Today I learned that you employ psychic pegasi warriors, my friends and my enemies are somehow a viable romantic match making opportunity, my father is a dick, humming makes you invisible, and that the changeling doesn't know about that secret perception check I succeeded at.

Your faithful student,
Whisper
Ramsus 21st Sep 2012, 2:26 AM edit delete reply
Ramsus
Dear Princess Luna

Today I learned that your sister's inbox is full.

Your faithful student,
Ramsus
William 21st Sep 2012, 3:22 AM edit delete reply
Dearest Princess Celestia,

Today I Learned that no matter how obvious and clear-cut a situation may be, it is always advisable to spend an inordinate amount of time and effort examining all the angles, otherwise unforseen circumstances will bite you in the ass. Also, never trust bishie sorcerers, elven rogues are rapists, a comrade who won't sell you out to save their own skin is a rare and beautiful thing, and Lawful Good and Lawful Evil look remarkably similar, and the Halfling always lies.

And most importantly, EVERYONE deserves a shot at redemption.

Your respectful correspondent,

Geffori Dalsirin, Druid of Andelaine.

*****************************************

My Dearest Princess Celestia,

Today I learned that no matter how just your cause or unjust the cause of your enemies, sometimes it is simply impossible to acheive victory with the resources at your disposal, and sometimes even with the resources at your disposal after you sell your soul for power and a fallen angel becomes your "imaginary" friend, so the only ansewr is to make deals and compromises, no matter how sickening they may be. Also, life is suffering, hope is pointless, joy leads only to despair, and the status quo is completely vile and almost impossibly hard to change.

Also, Father Joseph Castor is the worst Priest in the history of Priesting.

Your miserable peasant,

Oliver Martin, Ace of Diamonds to the Pumpkin King.
John Walter Biles 21st Sep 2012, 3:23 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned that wild mages are idiots and should not be allowed to cast spells. ANY spell. We went out in the woods to make sure that his effort to summon a familiar wouldn't cause damage we had to pay for.

Of course, it goes wrong and summons a Balor, who proceeds to fling him into the air and make him fall down and die. The cleric got turned into a tree. He beat me to death and ate the fighter. He ripped an arm off our halfling juggler but he somehow led it back to town where the Paladin killed us.

Mysteriously, animals ate the wild mage's body so he could not be raised. I thank them from the bottom of my heart.

So what did I learn today? Kill wild mages on sight.

Your Faithful Student,
Odo Proudfoot
Demonu 21st Sep 2012, 9:01 AM edit delete reply
Demonu
I play a wild mage and I resent that statement.
Ramsus 21st Sep 2012, 12:44 PM edit delete reply
Ramsus
That's more or less my feeling on prophets.
Smilez221 21st Sep 2012, 4:20 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned that paladins must always go in front of barbari- (no they should not!) What? Why not? (Because you're stronger!) But I take more damage! (No you don't!) Um, you have more health AND a higher AC. (But I heal things!) ... crap.

Today I learned that the barbarian must always be the head of the party.

... Followed by the paladin.

Also, work on lifting heavy things.

Your Faithful Student,
Smilez211
Gerkuman 21st Sep 2012, 6:36 AM edit delete reply
Gerkuman
Dear Princess Celestia

Sorry for slacking on the whole comic thing. Been pretty busy with life and depression and all that.

Anyway, Today I learnt that if people do honestly care about your work, then that's all the encouragement you need to continue.

I've been part of a gaming group now for the best part of 6 months to a year now, and while my first GMing campaign didn't go terribly smoothly (custom ruleset due to there not being many cop RPG's) I still had a great time and my friends were very encouraging.

Though getting a job might be nice.

Give my regards to Luna,

Your faithful Webcomic Producer,
J. 'Gerkuman' Adams.

PS: You might want to be careful what stuff about you gets put on the internet.
AttentionDeficitGuy 21st Sep 2012, 7:35 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia:

Today I learned that when your party leader requires you to use stealth, usually she means it. In the end, I did not hurt anybody but myself.

Your faithful student,
Atrim Falker
Zuche 21st Sep 2012, 8:06 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,
On the advice of Rarity, we spent the evening at a Bactrian sauna. While the attendants wore too much perfume for my taste, it was otherwise a wonderful way to unwind.

What I'm trying to say, Princess, is that there are few better ways to relax than in a bath, surrounded by scented camels.

Your faithful student,
Twilight Sparkle
Crimson Doom 21st Sep 2012, 9:08 AM edit delete reply
Crimson Doom
Dear Princess Cadance,

Just writing so that I can say that I was the first to write to you.

Your loyal subject,
Crimson Doom
LoganAura 21st Sep 2012, 9:58 AM edit delete reply
LoganAura
Dear Queen Chrysilis,

First

Your rebellious former subject,
Mirage.
Destrustor 21st Sep 2012, 4:07 PM edit delete reply
Destrustor
Dear Discord,
I know you've been intercepting all these letters from the commenters somehow, so I'm sending this one directly to you to see how you'll manage to intercept it before it reaches yourself. Have fun!

He who plays with fire, Lord Destrustor.
Greywander 21st Sep 2012, 7:07 PM edit delete reply
Greywander
Dear Lord Tirac,

How does it feel to be reincarnated 30 years later as a mare?

Spike,
Still a baby dragon
Jason Shadow 21st Sep 2012, 8:28 PM edit delete reply
Jason Shadow
Dear Lord Smooze,

Is it really true that nothing can stop you? Because I have to wonder if you can be kept at bay with naught but a jar of peanut butter and two slices of bread...

Your friendly extradimensional spirit of shadow,
Jason Shadow
Zontan 21st Sep 2012, 10:00 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

My campaign meets tonight. Will report back afterwards if I learn anything. I ask for the strength to resist the urge to wipe the party, no matter how stupid they are being.

Your faithful student,
Zontan
Zontan 21st Sep 2012, 9:55 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned that players never give forewarning of more than six hours when they aren't going to make it to your sessions. Also I learned that trying to host a campaign with a single player is a lost cause. Will try again next week.

Your loyal student,
Zontan
Skrytch 21st Sep 2012, 10:04 AM edit delete reply
Deer Prinsez Silestia

2day I lurnd that just because somthing smelz like baby don't mean it iz baby. also the guard at King Torg's (ALL HAIL KING TORG) lair iz meen and ate my apple.
do da fliying poneez taste like chikin?
signed
SKorg
******
In case you are unfamiliar with Kobolds Ate My Baby... what is wrong with you.
"skorg" also learned that with the right rolls it IS possible to drink a beer elemental.
shadotterdan 21st Sep 2012, 12:27 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today my DM taught me the difference between a search check and spot check after I found (and triggered) my third trap in that dungeon. Also fighters are good for soaking up trap damage
Raxon 21st Sep 2012, 12:28 PM edit delete reply
Raxon
Dear God Empress Faust,

Today, I taught someone that just because someone has a hobby or interest that society says marks them as a criminal, or a pervert, or both, that doesn't mean you should automatically assume they are. Different people have all different kinds of interests, and it's best to give them the benefit of the doubt before jumping to conclusions.

Your faithful student, Raxon Dunwich, Lord of mental anguish, Pretty princess of la la land, and King of Inzania.
Mocken999 21st Sep 2012, 7:11 PM edit delete reply
Dear Twilight Sparkle,

Today I learned that bring blind does notexemt you from being the most dangerous person inyour party, even if you are playing a bard.
DracoS 21st Sep 2012, 10:29 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Send help. I'm being forced to write friendship letters in the backroom of Sugar Cube Corner.

Your Faithful Student,
Draco S.
Ponyfodder 21st Sep 2012, 10:51 PM edit delete reply
Ponyfodder
Dear Empress Celestia,

Today, I learned that while the scatter dice may not cause you to hit where you want, it can also work out for the best. I also learned not to underestimate the power of an imperial shadowsword going nuclear.

Your Faithful Phaeron-
Devros the Invicible.
Kato 22nd Sep 2012, 1:46 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

being granted rule over a small town has taught me a lot of things. (You know what, not really? Because the citizens are all pretty lame... except for that brothel owner who I treated a little too kindly)
But the more important lesson: Sometimes it's a a good idea to be afraid. Like of magic runes. That try to trap you in a room with an 8 feet mass murdering skeleton. Next time I'll let my friends go in there alone if they feel greedy for more loot.

Your Faithful student,
Kato
Scootalol 22nd Sep 2012, 4:32 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today my friends and I learned that "Combat the Wyrm wherever it dwells and whenever it breeds" isn't always practical. As it turns out, werewolves do not work that well underwater. if Gaia had intended them to, then maybe they would be wereseals or weremink or perhaps even werecosteaus.

P.S., I apologize for the wet dog smell
Blue Moon of Storms 22nd Sep 2012, 4:45 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia.

Sometimes, the simplest plan is the best; but it brings such a smile to others faces when a complex plan begins to come into fruition.

Signed- "That guy who wants to make Scootaloo into a Cavalier riding a Motorcycle."

P.S. And by Cavalier I mean Knight. Not Cocky... Although that would probably be the appropriate attitude in that situation.
kriss1989 22nd Sep 2012, 6:57 AM edit delete reply
kriss1989
Dear Pricess Celestial,
I learned that Martain will break any game ever if he plays, even if he's not trying of is purposefully trying to take a handycap. He even broke Demon Souls. DEMON SOULS! Anyway I learned not to hold it against him and just give him bigger challenges. The purpose of the games is to have fun after all, and getting mad at his rediculously high level of play is just bad sportsmanship. Some people will be better than you at what you do and you just need to accept it.
Your less than stellar student,
Kriss
P.S. Can I get an extension on that thesis paper?
Appkes 22nd Sep 2012, 12:43 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia

I learned that casting the Anti Osmium Bomb does NOT count as stopping the villains plan, and will, in fact, get me slapped.
Colin 25th Sep 2012, 5:28 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned that the hurthling you saved in act one can become the one thing that makes you contact the father you hated, and who had most likely seen your dead body when you died two years ago, in act three.

He was the last link to the hurthling resistance and he's being framed for the assassination of the king (not for lack of trying, mind you). This forced my human psion, Minsk to contact her home on the psychic phone (magitek/steampunk setting). I rolled a d6 to see whether a maid (neutral), her old Nana (friendly, helped her run away) or her bigoted, profit-obsessed father.

Needless to say, he picked up. It wasn't precisely a happy reunion, especially as I proved my identity by reminding him of the time I tried to hock my dead mother's necklace. He only listened when I told him of the role of the Clown Guard (secret police of the court jester/Kefka ripoff) in the assassination. He wasn't happy, but trade was being affected,so asked us to come back to give evidence in a couple of days time. In a country where we had a price on our heads. Surprisingly, my party agreed.

Sadly, that plot thread was paused due to the end of the world being imminent. And the campaign as a whole has been paused due to one member being in Finland. :-(
Melisandre 28th Sep 2012, 1:57 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned not to play a rp session for 11 hours straight. By the end even the easiest riddles will take you hours to solve, and your only battle-oriented vampire teammate will fall asleep in the middle of the fight. Remember kids, proper sleep cycle is a must!

Signed,
The One Who Fell Asleep
Tatsurou 14th Oct 2012, 9:03 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,
Today I learned the importance of laughter. Our quest had taken us into a very dark area, and nearly the entire party was scared stiff, given we'd had a long series of bad rolls. We came to a split in the path, where we could go straight, left, or upward, and we had to decide which way to go. When asked, I suggested - jokingly - we take the 'right' path. Although the laughter was nervous, it relaxed all of us, and the ease of tension allowed us to make it through the rest of the quest.
For the rest of the quest, I took every opportunity to make a good joke, sparking laughter. In the end, we came across the boss, a lich - which apparently was pronounced like lick. I then asked, "How many lich's does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop?"
As the entire party cracked up laughing, the lich wound up laughing as well, so hard he accidentally knocked his phylactery off its hiding place on a high shelf, shattering it, destroying himself. (DM rolled a one)
That's how I earned the nickname "the laughing death."
Your faithful student, Tatsurou.
drhoz 15th Oct 2012, 5:16 AM edit delete reply
Today I learned that sometimes there isn't a Clue-Bat big enough. Even if your players have managed to survive a 30-month Cthulhu campaign through sheer jamminess and blind luck, sometimes they'll ignore the great big hints that they're in trouble.

Hints like putting the clues up online where they'll find them if they actually read to the end. Hints like the villain suggesting a few places they could go for clues.

Despite this, and more, they still manages to tell the cult leader all about their plans for taking down the cult. And have him translate for the witness. And arrange police protection for him so he'll be safe from the cult.
Jmangelo67 AKA Burnt Leaf 5th Nov 2012, 5:14 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,
Today I have learned that friends don't ALWAYS need to hear your opinions. Even if it sounds good in your head, it sometimes cannot come out right. So when you speak with friends, you have to get on the same level with them on an area f which they can understand. Sure, I can not make sense sometimes, such as the time I wanted to kidnap a child from the tyrannical king. When I tried to explain my rasoning, the entire party looked funnily at me. So now I realize that we should get on a similar level with your friends. Even if it means having to shut up and not voce your opinion.
Your forevor faithful Stallion Student,
Burnt Leaf.
Norakos 8th Mar 2013, 4:26 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned that the fastest way to make your DM cry is to launch the party tank and the BBEG with a catapult that you stole from the previous dungeon and wreck months of planning in the process.

Your faithful student, Norakos.
Super_Big_Mac 2nd Jul 2013, 12:00 AM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned that leveling your sneaking skills high enough so you can trot into an enemy's encampment and have them treat you as one of them is not always a good idea, especially if you ran ahead of the group.

Your Faithful Student,
SBM

Dore Westnaire: Thief with a heart of gold, Vagabond of a thousand bows, and Father of the Best Daughters in the land of Islein Tang'li-yek.
Kashia Carnia 27th Aug 2013, 6:00 PM edit delete reply
I'm writing what I learned from this: Dear princess Celestia:
Don't fuck with Fluttershy
YS 28th Dec 2013, 11:43 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Luna:

Roll reflex, I'm casting an AoE.

Your frequent correspondent,
YS
NecroLeprechaun 5th Feb 2014, 9:40 PM edit delete reply
Dear Princess Celetia, Today I've learned that while sometimes you might not like the way a friend might act, it's no reason to think less of them and set them up to fail so that you won't have to deal with them. It's best to talk to them and let them know how you feel, rather than bottling it up until you burst and seriously hurt their feelings.
Shadowbolt 10th Mar 2014, 4:53 PM edit delete reply
Dear Queen Nightmare Moon,

Today I learnîed that barbarians are like claymore mines: unsubtle and best pointed at the enemey, while you hide in the shadows laughing.

Stealthily.

Also? True Necromancers are hax. Boo yah, normal specialists!

Your obediant servant.